


Everybody's Got A Dark Side

by MyMindsMadness



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Boruto Era, Dirty Talk, F/M, Infidelity, OOC Kakashi, You're Welcome, dark!Kakashi, don't mix them up, kakasaku fic, sasusaku marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:01:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25258879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyMindsMadness/pseuds/MyMindsMadness
Summary: Kakashi Hatake was Sakura’s calm, lazy, understanding, and lovable ex-sensei. But when he becomes her ANBU partner, Sakura gets to see a darker side of Kakashi that she never suspected was there.It should have frightened her to see her long-time friend in this new light, not make her want a taste of the darkness.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Hatake Kakashi
Comments: 186
Kudos: 316





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, okay, okay. Let’s talk! I looooove the idea of BadBoi!Kakashi. What’s better than some BadBoi!Kakashi? A whole fic centered on him! 
> 
> Apparently, people REALLY want baddie Sakura too?? Originally, I had planned on kind of having Sakura pull Kakashi from that dark place, but everyone enjoyed Dark!Sakura in YKoW:ILI. Once a couple of people mentioned wanting to see more of that, this fic switched gears REAL fucking quick.But in the best way! This new direction is 10x better than I had initially planned! So with that, a couple of Disclaimers:
> 
> > Dark!Fic! Not in a ‘trying to overcome depression’ sort of way, but in a ‘No real lesson in overcoming that darkness’ sorta way. 
> 
> > There will be an excess of violence, smoking (cigarettes), and infidelity. 
> 
> > Despite the overall message/tone of the story, as a Buddist, I do not condone violence of any kind. Remember kids, holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. There is always a solution to confrontation that won’t make you compromise your inner peace. 
> 
>   
>  If you’re new to my works, welcome! We’re best friends now!
> 
> I do things a little differently than a lot of authors. Because I’m often struck by writer’s block, I don’t post stories until they’re done. That means that over the next few days, I will be posting multiple chapters until the whole story is up. At the end of every chapter are what I like to call my ‘coldnotes’. They’re notes, thoughts, and headcanons that I jot down while actively writing the story, and before even I know what the ending will hold. 
> 
> I try to respond to every comment, and kudos are very much appreciated, but you know what’s even better? Self-understanding and acceptance. You’re an amazing person with so much to offer the world and those around you. Never let anyone make you forget that   
> ♡  
>  Just a friendly note to anyone that wants to stay up to date with my work:
> 
> If you go to my AO3 profile, I generally have what I’m working on and the status up! If you follow me on Partreon, make sure you check there for advanced views of chapters!

* * *

Prologue

  
  


Perhaps Sakura hadn’t thought it through when she accepted Tsunade’s offer to join ANBU. She had been mad at Sasuke for missing their anniversary,  _ again _ , and the idea of doing something reckless was a lot more appealing. By the time Ino was done cursing his name, and Sakura’s hangover had worn off, the reality of her decision had sunk in. How could  _ Sakura _ be an ANBU agent? It was true that over the last year or so, that she had slowly moved away from the medical field, but this… This was like canon-balling into a pool when you had just learned to swim. 

Despite the sickening regret and apprehension the kunoichi felt at actually seeing through on the job switch, she couldn’t bring herself to back out. She had given Tsunade her word, and backing out now would mean slipping back into obscurity. Since her wedding, Sakura had tried to be many things. The first was a loving wife, and a suitable Uchiha matriarch. That lasted for all of six months. When Sasuke got the opportunity to leave on an extended mission without her, he jumped at the chance. Ever since, Sakura had been waiting patiently at home only to see her husband once every few years. 

When it was made clear that Sakura would be spending a majority of her marriage alone, she tried to throw herself into her work. It wasn’t hard to make her way up the ranks at the hospital. When you were a student of a legendary Sanin, you tended to be head and shoulders above the competition. It only took Sakura two years to be named Chief of Medicine, and less than one to regret it. The walls were too stale; the chatter too idle. Yes, she enjoyed saving lives, but most of the work she did was mundane. If she had to set one more Genin’s broken arm, she was going to scream. 

It seemed, no matter how unlikely, that Sakura was destined to join ANBU. The advanced training was hard, though it gave her a structure to hold onto. Tests and directions were easy for Sakura - it was the unknown that intimidated her. Once her coursework was complete, there was no putting it off. She was given the official ANBU uniform and a porcelain rabbit mask that held a diamond between the eyes. Slipping into the gear for the very first time had given Sakura a thrill. It wasn’t like the Jonin vest, where it was a simple marker of rank. When Sakura wore her ANBU uniform and mask, she was just a piece in a bigger machine. Faceless. Nameless. There was something cathartic about that. 

The last major point of anxiety for Sakura came at the mention of assigned partners. It had been decades since she was assigned to Team Seven, but the residual feelings of inadequacy were hard to shake. No matter how accomplished she had become, the thought of letting someone down still plucked at her insecurities. And then she met him. Well, re-met him. Kakashi Hatake. Her once-sensei and present friend (in the most casual sense of the word). The relief that swept through her was instantaneous. His familiar eye-crinkle and detached  _ ‘Yo’ _ , had been enough to ease the tension that had made its home between her shoulders. 

Having Kakashi as a partner made the whole ANBU ordeal more bearable. After all, he had always had Sakura’s back. 

* * *

  
  


**One**

The mission was simple enough, though that was probably because it was her first with ANBU. The criminal they were tracking down didn’t try to cover his trail, so it was only a matter of waiting for the right opportunity to take him out. Their orders were clear - kill anyone that got in their way, and leave nothing behind. 

Sitting under the cover of a large tree, Sakura leaned forward into her crouch, deep green eyes scanning the compound below. Kakashi had been quiet since they left the village, almost unnervingly so. Not once did he pull out his favorite book, choosing instead to watch everything with sharp eyes. She supposed he had to compensate for the loss of his sharingan now. Maybe that was why he was so on edge? She wanted to ask why he even rejoined ANBU. It seemed that after the Fourth War, Kakashi was destined for either the Hokage seat, or retirement. He had certainly earned it. Considering the two hadn’t really had a full conversation since the battlefield, it felt like too personal a topic. 

“Three in the main building.” Sakura just barely whispered. She was almost afraid to breath. They didn’t know who these men were, or what talents they possessed. A quick reading of the chakra told Sakura that there were at least five shinobi amongst them. 

“Six wandering around, but they seem avoidable.” Kakashi perched on his own branch a little higher, porcelain mask glinting in the moonlight as he moved forward on all fours. He was like an animal traversing the forest - completely natural. “I don’t care how many we have to take out as long as that scumbag goes with them.” 

Sakura was startled not only by the candidness of his words, but the malice in which they were spat. She had never known Kakashi to monger death, and he had never been what she would call cruel. “D-do you know this man?”

The white and red wolf mask tilted down towards her. “If I did, he wouldn’t have lived this long. The mark is wanted for slave trading. His last known victim was a five year old girl. I’m going to rip his throat out with my bare hands.” 

There was such a chill in the flatness of Kakashi’s voice that Sakura didn’t ask any more questions. What was it about this man that brought this side of Kakashi out? He was a bad man - terrible, really, but Kakashi had always fought terrible men. The hatred in his voice was completely new to Sakura. New and… strange. Something about the dark edges to his words sent chills down her spine. 

Even if this strange new Kakshi was out for blood, they approached the compound carefully, using the shadows to their advantage. The moon was high, but if they waited any longer, they might miss their opportunity until the following night. Hiding behind a building, Kakashi gave Sakura a signal that someone was coming. Pressing her body into the rough brick, she held her breath as footsteps drew nearer. 

Before the person had the chance to pass, Kakashi reached out, his hands moving like deadly vipers. The man might have tried to scream or fight, had he be given the chance. As soon as Kakashi had the man in his grasp, he snapped his neck in a single, fluid motion. 

As the lifeless body crumpled to the ground with little noise, Sakura’s lungs finally protested. It took all of her self control not to gasp for air as she eyed the dead man. Thankful for her ANBU mask, Sakura looked to Kakashi. He looked dangerous like this - all hard angles accented by the moon’s cold light. It was like he was in his very own element.  _ Who knew… _

They made their way through the compound, taking out enemies as they went. The first man Sakura had to kill weighed the heaviest on her heart. She had spent so much of her life trying to heal and save… this felt like she was undoing it all. But it was for the greater good. How many lives would killing these men save? She had to believe that Tsunade wouldn’t have even accepted a mission like this if it weren’t the right thing for Konoha. 

Finally, it was the moment of truth. The final, and largest building on the compound. Sakura had expected Kakashi to lead in with stealth and a master plan… not an explosive tag. 

As the tag detonated, and a thick smoke filled the large room, chaos broke out. Kakashi moved like a shadow himself, almost too quick to see as he bounced between pillars and victims. Sakura tried to keep up, taking out the henchman closest to their mark with one strong punch. By the time his body hit the ground, Kakashi had descended upon their target like an angel of death. True to his word, long, gloved fingers tore through flesh, wrapping around the man’s beefy throat. The panic in his eyes was tangible… and then it was gone. Blood splattered across their uniforms and masks as their mark fell to the floor, his throat still in Kakashi’s clenched fingers. 

Sakura watched her ex-sensei like she was seeing him for the very first time.  _ Who are you really, Kakashi Hatake? _

Sakura’s head nearly bobbed off of her palm where her chin had been resting. Try as she might, there was simply no sleeping the night before. In an attempt to maintain a cover whilst working for ANBU, she had agreed to take the odd shift at the hospital. The story going around was that she had finally lost it over Sasuke’s absence, and was attempting to become a recluse. As much as she would have liked to combat the rumors, Sakura supposed they were better than the truth. 

Rubbing her temples, Sakura tried to focus on the paperwork in front of her. Her reluctance to stay on task was beginning to make her feel like Naruto. Maybe that was why she welcomed the distraction when a familiar cloud of smoke and  _ ‘Yo’  _ showed up in the middle of her office. 

“Kakashi? What are you doing here?” Even after all these years, it was almost tempting to add  _ ‘Sensei’ _ after his name. Though, in light of recent developments, that might soon change. ANBU Kakashi was  _ nothing _ like her lazy teacher. Even now, as he stood in the middle of the stark-white room reading his beloved  _ Icha Icha _ , Sakura couldn’t quite view him the same way she had. 

“Ah. Afternoon, Sakura.” His eyes creased with his smile as he finally looked up.  _ This _ was the Kakashi, Sakura knew. Not the cold-blooded killer that wore a porcelain wolf mask. “Ibiki has a mission for us. I told him I’d let you know to meet after work.” 

“O-oh.” Sakura blinked. She hadn’t been expecting another mission so soon. “Yeah. Sure. I can meet you at headquarters.” She nodded quickly. Sensing his imminent departure, the kunoichi steeled her nerves. “Kakashi? Can I ask you something?”

She must have looked serious, because he pocketed his book and took a seat opposite her. “Something wrong, Sakura?”

Attempting to not come off as nervous as she felt, Sakura wrung her hands under her desk. “What was that - out in the field? I’ve never seen you so…”

When she didn’t finish her though, Kakashi hummed. “Ah. That.” He rubbed the back of his neck, thinking for a long moment. “That was ANBU.” Confusion still obvious, Kakashi got comfortable. “We, as shinobi, are the first and last lines of defense for the village. Because of that, we’re not treated as people, but as weapons. We do what we’re told, and we take pride in it… but we  _ are _ human. Sometimes, doing things in the name of Konoha or duty can weigh on us. ANBU allows us to embrace all that darkness we push away. All that anger, all that hurt, all that emotion we’re told to rid ourselves of.”

“So… You use ANBU as an outlet? Why not talk to someone, or find a hobby that channels all of that?”

“Stop thinking like a medic, Sakura.” His tone was light, but his words almost felt chastising. “Being able to focus that anger into doing something like taking the life of a terrible person… There is no equivalent.” Narrowing his eyes, Kakashi leaned forward. “Are you telling me, honestly, that you don’t feel it? That ball of tension that curls up in your chest? How it grows a little every time you’re ordered to kill without reason, or steal without an explanation?”

Of course Sakura knew what Kakashi meant. She felt it every time Sasuke stayed away because his mission had been extended. “I just… I don’t think I could ever  _ embrace _ that mindset.”

Kakashi hummed again as he stood. “That’s why you’re so unhappy.” His words hit her like ice water. “If you don’t find a way to let the darkness out, it will consume you until there’s no light left.” As his words settled around Sakura, Kakashi disappeared in a cloud of smoke. It was just as well, she had no response to give. 

They were undercover this time, playing the roles of a traveling couple. The city of Mirea, in the Land of Earth was hardly more than an outpost. Normally, they would have hired shinobi from the Hidden Stone to deal with their little problem, but it was farmed out to Konoha. Apparently, a rogue nin originally from the Hidden Leaf was holding the town captive. Once a week, he and his men would saunter into town and ‘collect their dues for keeping them safe’. It was a shakedown - one Sakura hated to see. 

The people of Mirea weren’t exactly well off. They had pooled the last of their resources in order to hire Kakashi and Sakura. Leaving without taking down their mark wasn’t an option. 

They arrived in town the day before the ‘collecting’ would happen. Dressed in civilian clothes, Sakura and Kakashi checked into the small inn. Although the town’s leaders knew who they were, the rest of Mirea’s residents did not, which meant they would have to keep a low profile until their target showed up. 

“The file puts this rogue nin at about sixty years old. Did you know him when he lived in Konoha?”

“Exactly how old do you think I am, Sakura?” Kakashi gave her a blank look as he opened the room’s only window. 

Opening her suitcase, the kunoichi rolled her eyes. “You know what I mean. He obviously hasn’t been in the village since I was a child. And you  _ do _ have fourteen years on me.”

“You wound me.” A familiar smell made Sakura’s head jerk up. 

As a ninja, Sakura always tried to be on guard. Expecting the unexpected was practically the first lesson taught in the academy. But nothing in her decades of training could have prepared her emotionally for the sight of Kakashi maskless. For the sake of the mission, he had worn a simple white hospital mask, which now hung uselessly around his throat. His deep eyes didn’t move to her - though he had to know that Sakura was staring. How could she  _ not _ !? Years of curiosity aside, Kakashi Hatake was…  _ hot _ . His face was thin and angular with sharp cheekbones and a defined jaw. His nose was long and squared, sitting neatly over surprisingly full lips. Just below them sat a small beauty mark - a feature that somehow humanized his otherwise ethereal face. Sakura wasn’t sure if it was the bright sun or years of habit that caused him to close his scarred eye. Maybe she could have asked. Maybe she could have focused on the unexpected beauty of his naked face. Maybe she could have formed any sort of coherent thought other than-

“Kakashi! Are you  _ smoking!? _ ” Sakura nearly screeched as he brought the cigarette to his lips again, his dark eyes opening and found her. A raise of silver brows was the only acknowledgement she received. “Do you know how bad those are for you!? They can kill you!”

She stomped over in a huff, but his amused, crooked smile made her feet falter. “Ah, Sakura. We risk our lives on a daily basis.” Maybe he thought that she would try to take it, because he leaned a little out the window. “It seems a little contradictory to lecture me given your line of work.” He hummed as her face grew red. 

“It’s not the same, and you know it!” Her eyes moved to the cigarette, watching it cautiously. She never quite understood the appeal of them before. 

When Sakura and Ino were eleven, they managed to get their hands on one. It was all Ino’s idea, of course, but Sakura agreed to go along with it - as she often did. They huddled in an alley with a giant box of matches and their devious trophy. Sakura still remembered how her heart pounded as Ino lit match after match only to have them be blown out by the wind. It was like nature itself was trying to stop them from their own stupidity. Finally, Ino prevailed. The taste was… terrible. Sakura didn’t even remember inhaling, but she  _ did _ remember it tasting like dirt. After that, both girls swore them off. 

Despite Sakura preaching against smoking her whole life, there was something so appealing about the way Kakashi made it look. Those dark eyes seemed to sparkle with humor as he wrapped his full lips around the end of the cigarette. This only served to remind Sakura that he was  _ maskless _ . Her blush must have been obvious, because the corners of his mouth lifted upward behind a steady stream of smoke. 

“Want to try it?” He asked, mistaking her staring to be for the cigarette he held between long, calloused fingers. 

“This feels like a bad after-school special.” Sakura scoffed, though part of her wondered if it felt as good as he made it look. “Next you’ll tell me that all the other shinobi do it.”

His teeth were straight and white behind his crooked smile. The cheek that didn’t bear his scar held the smallest of dimples. Sakura found herself entranced by it. “Not all. Just the fun ones.” He teased. 

“Ha, ha.” Sakura rolled her eyes again and took a step back as the smoke entered the room. “How long have you been smoking? I never remember smelling it on you before.” She crossed her arms with a frown. Just how little did she actually know about Kakashi?

“I only smoke on two occasions. When in the field on an ANBU mission, or after great sex.” His blatant admission and lackadaisical attitude made her accidentally inhale some of her own saliva. 

As Sakura coughed and gasped for air, her cheeks reddening as Kakashi awkwardly tried to pat her back, she tried to wrap her brain around what he had just said. Although they were the same rank, and it had been more than a decade since Sakura had been Kakashi’s student, she could never have imagined those words coming out of his mouth. Kakashi and sex were never two things that shared a thought in Sakura’s mind. Now, they seemed to swim round and round as his bare face burned itself into her mind’s eye. This partnership was going to be the end of her.


	2. Two

**Two**

The food in Mirea was… edible. That was about all Sakura could say about the white and grey blob that sat on her plate. Across from her in the tiny booth, Kakashi ate his meal without tasting it. He was far too preoccupied with his book, and Sakura was far too preoccupied with his bare face. After nearly dying of embarrassment at the inn, she suggested that they get some dinner and turn in early. The rumor was that their target would show up sometime after sunrise. They just had to lay low until then so he wouldn’t be tipped off. 

“Aren’t you worried that someone will recognize you? Your scar and hair are pretty distinct.” 

It was seemingly a task to pull his eyes away from the passage in front of him. When he did, Kakashi nearly scoffed. “Are you sure you should be lecturing me about distinct hair?”

Blushing at his accusation, Sakura leaned in, resetting her forearms on their shared table. It wouldn’t do to lose her temper and blow their cover within the first few hours. “Why do you keep insisting that I’m  _ lecturing _ you?” 

With a pointed look that she didn’t quite understand, Kakashi closed his book. Placing one elbow on the table, he cheerily laid his chin in his open palm. “It’s who you are, Sakura. You’re the worrier. The responsible one. The-”

“Mom friend…” Sakura finished dully. Ino used to call her that all the time. She used to think that her friend was just trying to get under her skin, but… had Ino been right all these years? 

“I suppose.” Kakashi shrugged. 

Knowing he wouldn’t be paying, Sakura dropped enough money for both of their meals on the table and stood. She was halfway to the inn before Kakashi managed to make it to her side without running. He must have sensed her ire, because he simply resumed reading. 

The conversation hadn’t exactly been heated, but Kakashi’s words spun around in Sakura’s head all night. It spoke to her mood that she didn’t even think twice about it when Kakashi removed his mask fully before crawling into their shared bed. Sure, Sakura had shared a bed with more comrades than she’d care to think about, but this was  _ maskless _ Kakashi. At the very least, she should be trying to memorize his face so that she could describe it to Naruto and Sasuke. 

Sasuke… was that why he didn’t want to come home? Because Sakura was  _ boring? _ She must have been for him to choose missions over her time and time again. And not once did he offer to take her with him. 

Squaring her jaw, Sakura reached over and shook Kakashi awake. “I was thinking about what you said. I want to do something reckless.”

Though a lifetime of ninja training meant that Kakashi was wide awake, he took a moment to process her words. “I’m flattered, Sakura, but I don’t think it would be appr-”

“No!” She nearly screeched, moving to the edge of the bed as her cheeks burned red hot. “No  _ that _ ! I’m married, for Kami’s sake!” He seemed unfazed by his misunderstanding, choosing to run a hand through his messy hair and wait for more information. “I want to try smoking.” 

“Ah… is that all?” Kakashi hummed, allowing his head to fall back to the pillow. “They’re in my shuriken holster.” He waved her off with one hand, eyes closing even as he spoke. 

Moving to the haphazardly thrown bag, Sakura carefully picked through the sharp blades to grasp the crushed carton within. It felt wrong to place the cigarette carefully between her parted lips. Taboo - in a sense. The feeling normally meant that she should stop what she was doing, but… What if that was her problem? Her whole life, Sakura might have been mistaking adrenalin for anxiety. Shakily lighting the match, she brought it to the tip of the cigarette. Nothing.

As the match died out and the tip remained unlit, she tried again. By the time she managed to fail a second time, Kakashi was out of bed and moving towards her. She expected a comment about how hopeless she was, or for him to be angry about wasting the last of his matches. Instead, Kakashi gingerly took the cigarette from her mouth and placed it between his own lips. 

“You want to pull air in short puffs - just inside your mouth until it’s lit.” He spoke out of the side of his mouth as he demonstrated. Of all the things Kakashi had ever taught Sakura, she never thought smoking would make the list. 

When he was sure it was well-lit enough to withstand Sakura’s inexperience, Kakashi took a long drag before holding it out to her. Tentatively, Sakura pulled the smoke into her mouth, nearly wincing at the taste. As the smoke passed her lips, she looked to Kakashi confused. Was she missing something?

“You’re not inhaling,” he summarized instantly. With a hint of a smirk, he nodded for Sakura to try again. “This time, after you pull the smoke into your mouth, breath in some air without releasing it.”

She did as she was told, regretting it instantly. As Sakura choked and fought off the instant nausea, Kakashi chuckled and took the lit cigarette from her so that she wouldn’t accidentally set the curtains on fire. “That’s  _ terrible! _ ” She tried to glare at him, but the fact that she was doubled over made it hard. 

“It gets better.” He took a long drag to prove his point. 

“You’re insane!” Sakura scoffed, finally catching her breath. “I’m  _ never _ doing that again!” He was still quietly chuckling as she flung herself under the covers. 

Taking out their target had been child’s play for the two seasoned shinobi. The people of Mirea sent them on their way with a thank you and questionably grey rations for the road. The journey back to the Leaf was much the same as all of Sakura’s other journeys with Kakashi. He didn’t smoke, or talk about murdering anyone. He simply read his book and only acknowledged her when it was time to stop for sleep or food. 

As much as this ‘dark’ philosophy of Kakashi’s went against everything that Sakura had ever stood for, she found herself intrigued by the notion. Was there something to this idiotic form of escapism? Was that why Kakashi was so good at what he did? The more she thought about it, the more it appealed to Sakura. 

They said their goodbye at the gates, Kakashi promising to turn in their mission report before heading home. Even though Sakura knew that it was probably a lie, she pretended to believe him for the sake of getting home before noon. The home she shared with Sasuke - though that definition was debatable - was one Sakura had picked out herself. After their wedding, Sasuke had wanted them to move into the deserted Uchiha compound. Although the younger version of Sakura would have wanted nothing more, the adult one was a bit more practical. This home was smaller and more suited to just the two of them. On top of that, it was close to both the hospital and her friends. Sasuke had agreed, though not without voicing his opinion on the size. 

Even if Sakura hadn’t sensed his chakra before entering, she wouldn’t have been all that surprised to find Naruto in her kitchen, upper body buried in the fridge. As her pack hit the floor, his head shot up. “Oh! We-com hom- S’kura!” he spoke through a full mouth.

“When I asked you to watch the place while I was gone, I didn’t mean to raid the fridge.”

He shrugged as he chewed, making sure to swallow before attempting to talk again. “Actually, I cleaned it out last week. I’m cleaning it out again because Saskue restocked. I didn’t think you’d be home so soon.” 

“Sasuke’s back?” Sakura felt her heart race in her chest. It had been seven months this time - twice as long as he had promised to be. “I didn’t know he was coming home.” 

Naruto frowned as he slowly closed the fridge door. “He  _ was _ home. He already left on another mission. He told me to say hi…”

“Hi?” Sakura blinked, her body nearly deflating at the news. Sasuke had finally made it home and hadn’t bothered to wait around for her? The irony was almost tangible. Worse - he didn’t bother to leave a note. “Hi…’ She repeated, as if the word would manifest her husband out of thin air. 

“I’m really sorry, Sakura.” Naruto dropped heavily into one of her kitchen chairs. “I tried to talk him into staying a few more days, but you know how he can be.”

“Y-yeah.” Sakura shook her head, forcing a fake smile to light up her face. “No worries, Naruto! He’s busy and it’s not your responsibility. I’ll catch him next time.” She had gotten very good at pretending her heart wasn’t breaking. After so many years, there shouldn’t be so much left. 

“Sakura…” Naruto frowned up at her. She knew that he wanted to help, but wasn’t very deep when it came to relationships. “It’s okay if you’re upset. No one would blame you. Just because you married Sasuke doesn’t mean that you’re not allowed to be angry at him.”

She didn’t want to go there. If she followed that trail of thought, she would… end up somewhere dark. Instead, Sakura sat opposite Naruto and changed the subject. “So, I hear Boruto is finally graduating! Are you ready for that?”

For all his lack of sense, Naruto knew when to play along. “It doesn’t feel real, you know? But with Granny Tsunade stepping down soon, I don’t think things are going to feel real for a while. Can you believe that I have to go to Suna for a whole month!? Hinata is going to go crazy dealing with the kids alone!”

Of course Sakura believed it. Unbeknownst to Naruto, she and Kakashi were his ANBU detail. They’d been given special hoods to wear for the duration of the trip. Until Naruto was officially Lord Sixth, he wasn’t allowed to know any ANBU identities. That also meant that outside of their rooms, Kakashi and Sakura would have to be in full gear. Just the thought of having to wear all the equipment, plus a mask,  _ plus _ a hood in the desert was enough to make Sakura question her career choices. 

“Hinata puts up with you. I’m sure she can handle a couple of children.” Sakura gave a genuine smile as he pouted. She’d wait until Naruto left to completely crumple under the weight of her failing marriage. 

Kakashi landed on the windowsill of the Hokage’s office, his eyes not leaving the pages in front of him. He sensed his former student right away, but said nothing as Tsunade rose from her seat to round her desk. It seemed that Kakashi had interrupted something - something that could very well piss off a couple of the strongest shinobi in the village. After a tense silence as they debated whether or not to continue in front of him, Sasuke tisked and turned without a word. Only when the door closed behind him did Tsunade rechannel her anger at Kakashi. 

“That student of yours is a real piece of work!”

“Hmm?” Kakashi finally looked up, feigning ignorance. “Are we talking about Naruto or Sakura?”

“Don’t play stupid, Hatake! You know damn well which little shit I’m referring too!” Reaching onto her desk, Tsunade grabbed a full glass of sake. With half a glare, she tossed it back. “Did you know that he’s leaving? I told him that Sakura was probably already back, but ‘ _ the house is out of his way’ _ !” 

“That does sound like Sasuke.” Kakashi frowned behind his mask as his feet hit the floor. Sakura, it seemed, was always waiting around for a man that refused to see her. “So you sent him on another mission?”

“I didn’t have a choice.” She snarled. “Order from the council - old windbags.” Finally, Tsunade retook her seat. “Be honest with me, Hatake… Is Sakura okay?”

Kakashi nearly sighed as he looked out the window and over the village. Was Sakura okay? Were any of them? “She copes.” He answered honestly. 

Truth be told, Kakashi had avoided Sakura for years. It might have been immature, but he knew that with Sasuke coming and going, it would weigh on his former student. The mistake that Kakashi made was assuming that she would handle it the same way she did when she was a young girl. Before being partnered with her in ANBU, Kakashi hadn’t even been truly aware of how much she had grown. He expected the bubbly, if not somewhat loud, girl that he had met decades prior. This Sakura… she was his equal. Maybe that was why it had been so easy to let his guard down around her. And now that he’s begun to see her as an equal and a friend… It made it harder to ignore the way she was being treated. 

“Sounds like a happy marriage to me.” Tsunade muttered, taking his mission report. “You and I had the right idea, Kakashi. No marriage means no problems.”

Because he didn’t wholly agree, Kakashi simply hummed. “Sasuke has been a weakness for Sakura long before they got married.” He admitted. “Maybe that’s part of the problem.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sakura** : nOt tHAt
> 
> **Us** :
> 
> And are we not going to talk about how his only objection was the ‘appropriateness’? And how he had to THINK about it?? *she says like she didn’t write it* I see you, Kakashi.
> 
> Please tell me I’m not the only one that got a little weak-kneed at: ‘  
>  Kakashi gingerly took the cigarette from her mouth and placed it between his own lips. ‘
> 
> I know Kakashi smoking is borderline kink-worthy, but DON’T SMOKE! This has been a PSA.
> 
> In my past KakaSaku fics, I liked starting with one or both already having feels, but I reeeeeaaaalllllllly wanted to go all in on this friends to lovers plotline. I feel like the payoff is going to be *chef’s kiss*


	3. Three

**Three**

The desert sun was relentless. Or maybe Sakura had just started to hallucinate from the sheer amount of heat that gathered under her hood. Not for the first time in her life, the kunoichi cursed being born with pink hair. A look to Kakashi gave nothing away. His posture was relaxed as they walked, his hands buried in his pockets. Naruto, on the other hand, voiced all of Sakura’s mental grievances. At least he had the luxury of water as often as he liked. She had to wait until he was preoccupied or focused on the briefing Tsunade had given him. 

The mission to Suna was nothing more than a diplomatic playdate. With Naruto next in line to become Hokage, it was important that he was seen rubbing elbows with Konoha’s oldest allied village. Of course, with Gaara heading up the Hidden Sand, there was no real point. Everyone knew that the two had been friends since childhood. 

Regardless of heat or sun, the trip was practically a vacation. Though, Sakura would have preferred to spend it in a bikini, not an ANBU outfit. At least a dozen times, Naruto had attempted to make conversation with the two of them. Afraid he would recognize her voice, Sakura stuck to simple yes or no gestures. Kakashi, either out of the same fear or desire to avoid small talk, did the same. 

Luckily for the three shinobi, Suna wasn’t the longest trip. By the time they arrived, Sakura wanted nothing more than to take a nice cool shower and get into her pajamas. Of course, that had to wait until after several hours of pomp and diplomatic greeting procedures. Originally, Naruto was supposed to take the center out of three adjoining rooms. Because the center room had the biggest bathroom, he insisted on ‘the lady ANBU’ taking it. Lack of being able to argue with the future Hokage meant that Sakura could do little more than shake her head before being forced to take the room between Kakashi and Naruto’s. It was going to be a trying month…

Sakura eyed the large bathtub through the open bathroom door. It had been a long trip, and what felt like a longer dinner while Gaara and Naruto caught up. Although the Kazekage had his own staff and security, Kakashi and Sakura were under strict orders to watch him at all times. Sakura wasn’t sure if this was for his safety, or because Tsunade still didn’t trust him not to stick his foot in his mouth. Either way, Sakura was forced to watch him stuff his face, knowing that she would have to wait until she was in her room to eat. 

Now, with Naruto turned in for the night, and Sakura’s dinner properly put away, a bath was calling her name. Which was why Kakashi chose that moment to open their adjoining door without so much as a knock. She eyed him as he casually laid himself across the foot of her bed, beloved  _ Icha _ in hand. She waited for him to speak, but he simply kept on reading. Naturally, Sakura broke first. 

“Did you need something, Kakashi?” She nearly sighed as his eyes curled with his smile. 

“Oh. I didn’t see you there, Sakura.” It was only knowing that he was trying to get under her skin that kept Sakura calm. “I’m going to head out in a little while. Care to join me?”

Had the heat gotten to Kakashi? Maybe he wasn’t daring, but insane. “We can’t  _ go out _ , Kakashi. In case you’ve forgotten, we’re here on a mission. We’re supposed to stick with Naruto at all times. We can’t risk someone seeing us.”

He simply waved her off. “You can’t always do what you’re told. Life’s too short for that, and Naruto is well protected here without us.” Standing, he finally pocketed his book. “Besides, I raided the Undercover Sector of HQ before we left.” 

Sakura’s eyes narrowed as she attempted to digest what he was saying. Kakashi had stolen ANBU resources so that they could play dressup and sneak out? “You’re a giant child.” She finally decided. “What happens if we get caught?”

Slipping into his own room through the still-open door, Kakashi chuckled. A second later, a heavy duffle bag was being pressed into Sakura’s arms. With mischief lighting his dark eyes, he leaned in to stage-whisper. “What happens if we  _ don’t _ ?”

There was something infectious about Kakashi’s bad influence. He had a way of making even the dumbest ideas seem worth the risk. Besides, Sakura promised herself that she would try to open up more. With Sasuke gone… she needed it. She needed the release Kakashi’s schemes promised. 

The duffle held several changes of civilian clothes, as well as three different wigs. Part of Sakura wondered how it was that Kakashi knew her sizes, but thought it better not to ask. Because he had been vague about their destination, Sakura wasn’t sure what to wear. Given that it was night time, she could only assume a bar. Nothing else would be open past sundown. Settling on a simple black dress that neither showed too much nor too little skin, she slipped it on. She had brought her own makeup on the trip - more out of habit than necessity. For all her training and struggle to be seen as an equal amongst the boys, Sakura could still hear her mother’s voice demanding that she always look her best. Finally, Sakura picked up the short blonde wig and worked to tuck her own hair underneath it. She had been growing her hair out again, and the wig almost made her feel nostalgic. 

“Are you still getting ready?” Sakura rolled her eyes as she double-checked her makeup. Leave it to Kakashi to be ready  _ before _ her when it came to breaking the rules. 

“Well you did kind of spring this on m-” Turning, Sakura froze. 

She had expected Kakashi to be good at disguising himself - he had to be. He was the legendary Copy Nin. His face was one of the most recognizable (though, most only saw half of it) in the world. What Sakura  _ hadn’t _ expected was to recognize this alternate-Kakashi. Or rather, Sukea.

“You… asshole!” She nearly yelled before remembering Naruto in the next room. Her train of thought almost derailed when he smiled. “All these years! We saw your real face when we were twelve!”

“Hmmm?” Kakashi hummed, though he still smiled. “I suppose so. I had forgotten about that.” The word  _ liar _ was on the tip of Sakura’s tongue, but she swallowed it as his dark eyes traveled slowly over the length of her body. Fighting the urge to cover herself, Sakura bit her cheek. “You look good.”

“T-thanks.” It was a simple compliment. One that should  _ not _ have made Sakura feel warm all over. It spoke to how deprived for attention she was. “Let’s go before I change my mind.”

Sakura felt foolish sneaking out in a dress in heels. It reminded her of the time she and Ino had stayed out  _ way  _ past curfew at a party and had to sneak back into her room before her parents found out. They failed, of course, but only after climbing the rose-covered trellis barefoot. Sakura had thorns in her palms for days, but it had made for a fun story. 

Sneaking from their rooms onto the main grounds of the Kazekage’s compound had been the easy part. It was only with Kakashi’s keen sense of hearing that they managed to get out into the actual village. Try as she might, Sakura couldn’t help but stress about the fact that they would have to sneak back  _ in _ . Then again, if anyone could pull it off, it was Kakashi. 

“Where are we going?” Sakura asked as her heels clicked lightly against the newly paved road. It seemed that like Konoha, Suna had gone through some ‘modern upgrades’. 

“Ah. Not knowing is half the fun.” She rolled her eyes as he winked. “Come on, Sakura. You can’t tell me you’re not having fun.” 

She looked away as he pulled a cigarette out of his crumpled pack. Despite feeling a bit foolish and childish, Sakura found that she  _ was _ . “I feel like a teenager.” She smiled lightly.

“Some would argue that your teen years are the best of your life.”

“I wouldn’t know. I spent mine chasing Sasuke down and fighting in a war.” She nearly winced. Leave it to Sakura to bring down the mood by mentioning the war. It wasn’t like Kakashi was exempt from it. He knew full well how terrible it was. 

Releasing a steady stream of smoke, Kakashi examined her profile. “Well then… I suppose we have a lot of ground to cover.”

As they drew closer to the civilian quarter of the village, the streets became more lively. There were bright red and yellow lanterns lighting their way now - the hum of people not far off. According to the flyers and banners, it was the summer solstice and things were in full swing. Sakura was surprised when they rounded a corner and immediately found themselves in the middle of some kind of parade. As she stood gaping at the bright colors and loud music, people pushed past in all sorts of weird costumes. 

Sakura hadn’t even realized her feet had stopped moving until Kakashi lightly grasped her wrist and tugged. “Come on!” He screamed over the steady beats of drums. “If we get to the front, we can watch the fire dancers!”

Sakura found it hard to believe that there even  _ was _ a front. It seemed to be one large mob with no beginning or end. One bright costume blended into another as Kakashi led her by the wrist through the crowd. Over their heads, large floats shaped like phoenix’s danced. It was… amazing. The most beautiful thing Sakura had ever seen. She would have been perfectly content to just stand on the side of the road and watch it all go by. 

As they made it to the ‘front’ the crows seemed to grow denser, forcing Kakashi to shift his hold to her hand. Sakura wanted to argue that she was an elite shinobi, fully capable of navigating a crowd, but she wasn’t sure that was the truth. There was something intoxicating about the steady beat of the music and jovial spirit of the people around her. 

“I’ll be right back!” He screamed, ducking his head so that she could hear him. 

Sakura simply waved him off, entranced as the fire dancers came into view. They were mostly women, dressed in a scarf-like material with a headdress reminiscent of the phoenix overhead. The kunoichi watched in awe as fire seemingly erupted from their hands. They tossed the ball of fire between them, their bodies moving with more fluidity that Sakura had ever seen. It was almost more of a ritual than a dance. 

She was shaken from her trance as Kakashi returned holding two very large, very colorful glasses. “I have no idea what’s in these, but they’re supposed to be strong.” He smirked as he handed her one. 

Sakura watched the sparkle in Kakashi’s eyes as the beat of the drums pounded through her entire body. Forcing her gaze away, she thanked him and took a sip of her drink. It didn’t  _ taste _ strong. In fact, it tasted like fresh fruits and sugar. With a hum that was drowned out by the music, Sakura took a deeper drink, eyes moving back to the dance in front of her. The women had traded in their balls of fire for long silk ribbons during her distraction. The soft cloth danced on the wind, wrapping around the ones that wielded it. 

“You might want to slow down.” Kakashi advised. Sakura blinked down at her drink, startled to find that she had almost finished it. 

Maybe it was the alcohol pounding through her veins, but Sakura found herself smiling up at him. “Come on, Kakashi. Lighten up!” She teased, earning a wide smile for ex-sensei. 

It seemed the main dance was done, because the women started to pull people from the crowd into the makeshift ring. Some knew how to dance to the steady music - locals, Sakura assumed. Most attempted to follow the instructions that the dancers openly offered. When Sakura made eye contact with one of the women, she knew it was inevitable. Placing her now-empty cup down on a nearby booth, she turned just in time to be dragged out into the circle. 

“Move like this!” The woman instructed, raising her hands and shifting her weight from one hip to another. Sakura - in her drunken euphoria - did as she was told. “Good!  _ Feel  _ the music!”

Sakura closed her eyes, letting the steady  _ thump, thump _ of the drums pulse through her body. When she opened them, her instructor was gone, and Kakashi was watching her with amusement. With a wicked smile, Sakura curled one finger. The immediate denial and fear on his face made her wish she had brought a camera. With a giggle, Sakura reached for him, grabbing him by the wrist as he managed to discard his own cup. 

“Dance with me!” She demanded, practically jumping to the beat of the music. “It’s fun!”

“I don’t dance!” He insisted as she lifted his arm to twirl underneath. 

“Sure you do! You’re doing it right now.” Kakashi practically rolled his eyes, but didn’t fight as Sakura led him in a structureless dance. 

After a moment or two, he gave into Sakura’s infectious joy, bobbing slightly, if not a bit uncomfortably. When Sakura threw her head back and laughed, Kakashi leaned into it even more. She had finally done it - she had found something that Kakashi Hatake wasn’t inherently good at. Still, Sakura held onto his hand as she bounced and twirled, nearly screeching when Kakashi spun her quickly the opposite way. She giggled as he caught her, his arms wrapping tightly across her own. 

Dizzy, Sakura rested her head against his chest and closed her eyes. “This is the most fun I’ve ever had.” she admitted, though she wasn’t sure he could hear her over the pulse of the music. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I’ll say it. Dark!Kakashi could get it. 
> 
> Tbf, normal Kakashi could get it, but you know.
> 
> I based the summer solstice festival off of Mardi Gras in the USA. Because I’ve never actually been, I had to use a lot of cliche’s/Google images. 
> 
> Originally, Kakashi was going to take her to a club/underground bar, but this just… happened?? Like, I swear these stories have a mind of their own. 
> 
> Can I just say - can I… *takes a moment to compose herself*. I love their friendship, okay? Like friends to lovers is my jam, and I can already see it developing. There’s something really pure and amazing about two people just having fun. No sexual undertone, no tension, just genuine care and levity. 


	4. Four

**Four**

“You-ra bad in-fluence.” Sakura struggled to get out as Kakashi carried her on his back. Somehow, he had managed to go drink-for-drink with her, but not feel it at all. If Sakura had thought to burn off the alcohol with her chakra  _ before _ getting completely wasted, she might have been able to walk. 

“Would you believe, that’s not the first time that I’ve heard that?” He hummed. With her chin resting heavily on his shoulder, she could just catch one side of his smile. 

“You gotta dim-ple.” Sakura giggled as she brought a hand up to press it firmly. “Boop!”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you get quite this drunk, Sakura.” He admitted, amused. “I wonder what secrets I could extract from you.” Even in her state, she knew he was joking. 

“I don’t have sea-crets!” She scoffed, tightening her hold on his shoulders a little more. “Your-da one that hidess your pr-ty face.”

“Did you just say  _ pretty _ ?” Kakashi frowned.

“Man-pre-ty!” Drunken Sakura tried to correct - forgetting the word handsome existed. “Li-k fora man! If you we-rn my sense… my sensee…. sensei! If you we-rn my ex-sensei, an-I was’n marr-ied, I’d be like… on it.”

She could have sworn that he flushed, but that was probably just the alcohol. “Well, _as_ your ex-sensei, I suggest you stop there.” He cleared his throat. “I’m not sure what ‘ _ on it’ _ entails, but I can almost guarantee that you’ll regret saying it in the morning.”

Giggling to herself, Sakura buried her face in his neck. “Means I-d s-uk you so goo-d, you’d pass-out.” 

“Kami, help me....” Kakashi hissed as his footsteps faltered. “Where did you learn to say something like  _ that _ !?”

“My brain-head.” Sakura murmured as her mind grew foggier. 

“We’re going to pretend this conversation didn’t happen.” After three deep breaths Sakura could feel because she was on his back, Kakashi hiked her up a bit further. “We’re almost to the Kazekage’s compound now, so make sure you stay quiet.” His words went unheeded as Sakura snored into his neck. 

The blaring of Sakura’s alarm might as well have been clawing at her eardrums. With a groan and far more force than needed, she hit the offensive device, wincing when she felt it practically crumble under her fist. She had the hangover to end all hangovers, and it was only day two of thirty in Suna. For the sake of soothing her bad mood, she instantly blamed Kakashi. Channeling some chakra into her fingertips, Sakura brought her hand up to her temple and eased the throbbing there. It wasn’t enough to completely rid her of her hangover, but enough to get out of bed. 

As Sakura strapped on her wristguards, her wet hair still hanging limply after her shower, Kakashi pushed his way into her bedroom. “No. No you don’t.” She hissed when he raised an eyebrow. “Last time you sauntered in here, you caused this.” She gestured to her head. 

“Ah. Hungover?” He smiled, pulling his hood over his hair. “I warned you not to have that third drink.” 

“Third?” Sakura blinked. “The last thing I remember is… dancing. What happened after that?”

Kakashi’s brows nearly disappeared under his hood as well. “You mean you don’t remember insisting on matching tattoos?”

Sakura paused, but only for a moment. “Har, har. Very funny.” She sighed. The only tattoo Sakura possessed was her ANBU mark, and she adored it immensely. Pulling her own hood on, Sakura frowned. “I didn’t… say anything embarrassing, did I?”

Kakashi hummed. “Like what?”

“I don’t know!” Pouting, Sakura made sure all of her hair was tucked away before grabbing her mask. “I tend to have no filter when I’m drunk. It usually leads to me sticking my foot in my mouth.”

Shrugging, Kakashi adjusted his gloves. “I don’t remember you saying anything embarrassing. Then again, I was pretty drunk too.”

Before she could question him any further, a knock came from the door opposite Kakashi’s. “Hey! Lady ANBU! You guys ready?”

Exchanging a look with Kakashi, the two slipped on their masks. 

  
  


It was their fifteenth day in Suna, and Sakura found herself standing in the corner of the room while Naruto and Gaara talked at length about trade routes. From what the kunoichi could gather, absolutely nothing was changing. Still, they talked for nearly three hours before they were interrupted by Gaara’s personal assistant. 

“Lord Kazekage.” The woman bowed deeply. “A Mr. Sasuke Uchiha is here to see you. Should I have him wait in your office until you’re done?”

Sakura stiffened. Sasuke was here? Now? Thanks to his eye, he’d probably be able to see right through Sakura’s disguise. Naruto finding out aside, Sakura had taken a position in ANBU without consulting Sasuke. It wasn’t that she was going behind his back, but that he hadn’t been home long enough to tell. 

“Sasuke is here?” Nartuo blinked. “He can join us if you want, Gaara. I don’t mind.” Next to Sakura, Kakashi shifted his weight from one foot to another. 

Sakura was stuck. She couldn’t leave the room without drawing suspicion, and she couldn’t hide from Sasuke’s all-seeing gaze. The only thing she could do was hold her breath as Sasuke was shown in. He greeted Naruto and Gaara before his eyes moved to the two ANBU against the back wall. It was only through a lifetime of observing him that Sakura caught the subtle way his eyes narrowed. Would he say something? Would he blow her cover?

Instead, Sasuke forced his eyes back to Naruto and took a seat. Perhaps Sakura should have been relieved that he didn’t cause a scene, but that knot of tension in her chest simply tightened. For the first time in nearly a year, she was in the same room as her husband, and he didn’t even give her a second glance. 

Even though Sasuke’s anger was palpable, Sakura smiled like a fool when she found him in her room. Removing her mask, she opened her mouth to speak, but he beat her to it. “What are you doing here, Sakura?”

“I’m… working?” Hadn’t it been obvious? “I know I didn’t get the chance to tell you about ANBU, but-”

“You should have.” He cut her off, a deep frown pulling at his lips. “You’re supposed to be my wife. Didn’t you think to talk to me about a decision this big?”

“I  _ tried _ !” Sakura defended. “You never come home!”

“So this is my fault?” He gestured to her uniform. “Is this to get my attention?”

“N-no.” Sakura cursed inwardly as tears pressed at her eyes. “It was just… something I wanted to do.”

“And what about our future?” His voice was gentler now, but still cross. “I want us to have children, Sakura. How could we if their mother was out risking her life instead of raising them?”

Sakura blinked at the news. This was the first Sasuke had ever spoken of them having children. When they had first married, she thought it was the inevitable next step. It was one of the reasons she had agreed to running the hospital. When Sasuke’s missions became longer and longer, Sakura gave up that hope. Perhaps she should have been excited that he wanted to expand their family, but that little ball of darkness in her chest pressed downward.

“Me? What about you?” Her voice came out wounded and not as angry as she would have hoped. Then again, she never could seem to be angry at Sasuke. “You’re always gone. Do you expect me to just raise our children on my own?”

His eyes narrowed again - like he was seeing something in Sakura he had previously missed. “I can’t exactly carry them. What good would I be? You’ve always been the nurturing one.”

“What about being there for  _ me _ !?” Her voice broke as her fists clenched at her sides. “You haven’t even seen me in nearly a year, and all you care about is the job I took while you were gone? Didn't you miss me at all?”

He tisked, closing his eyes. “You’re being hysterical, Sakura.” It was like a punch to the gut. “I can’t talk to you when you’re like this.” Opening his eyes, he pinned her with a cold look. “I’ll return to the village in a month. We’ll talk about all of this then.” 

Because Sasuke’s words had turned her to marble, Sakura simply watched as he climbed through her open window, leaving her chest tight and cold. 

Sakura fought the urge to groan as they came to the peak of yet another sand dune. When Naruto announced that they had the day off, the kunoichi had plans to laze about in the Kazekage’s air-conditioned home until she would be forced to wear her suffocating uniform again. Yet here she was, traversing the desert on Kakashi’s word that they would be doing something fun. After instructing her to change into the swimsuit pack in her undercover duffle, he had led Sakura along the outskirts of the village. Another hour walk into the deseret, and they were  _ still _ surrounded by sand. With every step, Sakura found it harder to lift her foot. She was sure that she was beginning to see mirages when a bright oasis surrounded by tall, shady trees came into view. As they neared it, she realized that it was their destination. 

“How did you even know this was out here?” She panted, taking a long drink from her cantine as Kakashi toed off his shoes. 

“When you’ve been a field operative as long as I have, you tend to learn a few secrets.” He seemed relieved when he pulled off his mask, though the forming tan line left behind made Sakura bite her lip. 

It had been nearly a week since Sasuke showed up in her room, and Sakura had felt off ever since. It was only during their walk to the oasis that Sakura realized what she was feeling. Anger. She was  _ angry _ at Sasuke. It was the first time she could ever remember feeling that way towards him. Trying to push all thoughts of Sasuke from her mind, Sakura stripped off her outer layer until she was left in the surprisingly tasteful bikini Kakashi had brought for her. She just hoped that no one else had worn it previously. 

He was already in the sun-warmed water when she sank in, his eyes closed and face turned upward. Sitting on a protruding rock, Sakura examined his profile. She wasn’t sure why she felt the need to continue doing so. He had practically shown his face every time they were alone together, but Sakura always found herself entranced by the small things. Sometimes it was the tiny beauty mark on his chin. Others, it was his scar. Most recently, she had developed a minor obsession with his dimple…  _ dimple… _

Squeezing her eyes closed as the memory of her drunken night came flooding back, Sakura hissed. Kakashi hummed from his seat, but she couldn’t bring herself to look at him. “Something wrong?”

“Please tell me I didn’t offer to ‘ _ suck you so good, you’d pass out’ _ .” 

“Ah. That.” She knew that he was smiling before her eyes even opened. 

“You remembered!?” Sakura’s reddened cheeks deepened in color. Sure, she found Kakashi attractive - she wasn’t blind. But to say…  _ that _ . 

“Hard to forget.” His crooked smile made an appearance. “Not an offer I get often, sadly enough.”

“Just let me drown.” She mumbled, sinking into the water until it was under her nose. 

His deep chuckle only spurred her blush on. “It’s not that big of a deal, Sakura. You were drunk.” He raised an eyebrow, as if she were completely overreacting to the fact that she had offered to  _ suck him so good, he’d pass out! _ Those words were going to burn themselves into her brain. “To be honest, it was flattering for an old man like me.”

“Old?” She lifted her head, her eyebrows furrowing. Kakashi might have been  _ older _ , but he certainly wasn’t old. The fact that she had to actively work to not stare at his bare, scarred chest spoke to that. “You are  _ not _ old, Kakashi.” 

“I’ll be forty soon.” He pointed out.

“And forty is not old!” Sighing, Sakura let her head fall back against the bank of the water. “What is it with the men in my life trying to make me go insane?” 

He hummed. “I heard what Sasuke said. I didn’t mean to, but the door was open.” So that he wouldn’t see the emotion in her eyes, Sakura kept her head where it was. “He’s wrong - if my opinion counts for anything.” She smelled the smoke from his cigarette more than saw it.

“I used to think that not having Sasuke was what caused that ball of tension in my chest - my darkness. But now…”

“But now?” Kakashi urged when she didn’t continue. 

Forcing her head straight, she caught his deep eyes. “I’m starting to think that he’s the reason for it…” 

There was a long moment where Kakashi just… watched her. “So… what are you going to do about it?” Her distress must have been clear on her face, because he straightened. “I know that you’re used to him taking control, but this choice has to be yours Sakura. Only you can decide what will make you happy.”

Biting her lip, Sakura twisted her hands together. “What if I can't? What if I’m not strong enough to make it?” Her voice was only a whisper - scared of the words she spoke. 

To her surprise, Kakashi smiled. “You’ve always been the strongest woman I’ve ever known. Don’t let him take that away from you too.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Sakura… You drunk fool.  
> You know what they say - drunk talk, sober thoughts ;D
> 
> **Sasuke** : *breathes*  
>  **Us** :  
> 
> 
>   
> Yo, but for real, he’s a dooooouche. Ladies (men, and other), don’t let anyone treat you like this! Your feelings are valid! 


	5. Five

**Five**

They were  _ finally  _ going home. Although Sakura was more than thankful for the drop in temperature as they crossed the border into Fire Country, the humidity made it impossible to take refuge in it. She just couldn’t win. Between her and Kakashi, Naruto rambled on about all the ramen he was going to eat when they reached home, having given up on getting a response from his escorts. She was thankful for the noise. Ever since Kakashi took her to the oasis, Sakura’s mind kept playing over her conversation with Sasuke. It took about a week of sleepless nights, but Sakura came to a startling conclusion… She didn’t want to have his children. Not with things the way they were. If Sasuke wanted to start a family, he had to be willing to be a part of it. 

Naruto’s voice trailed off as several foreign chakras closed in around them. Heart in her throat, Sakura moved to cover his left while Kakashi took his right. Although Naruto was more than capable of defending himself, Tsunade had ordered him back without a hair out of place. Sakura was sure that it had more to do with her shishou’s retirement than it did Naruto’s wellbeing. 

The first round of shuriken were predictable, and easy to deflect with a kunai. Behind her, Sakura heard the telltale sounds of metal on metal. They were attempting to surround the three. If the situation weren’t so nerve wracking, she might have enjoyed the nostalgia of fighting alongside Naruto and Kakashi at the same time. 

The first enemy that stepped out of the treeline was quickly sent back with a well-placed punch. According to his headband, they were dealing with missing nin from the Mist. Keeping Naruto and Kakashi in her peripheral, Sakura focused on the next brute. Even without words, the three shinobi worked together perfectly. Sakura wasn’t vain enough to think it was all thanks to skill. Working in tandem was a practice learned over many years with the same team. 

One of the enemies managed to slip Naruto’s shadowclone, making a beeline for Kakashi. Knowing that Kakashi might not see him in time, Sakura moved. The enemy’s blade was thrust forward as she reached him, her mask taking the brunt of the attack. Sakura winced as the porcelain splintered, cutting her forehead before falling to the ground. 

“Sakura!” Kakashi called, unable to turn from his current fight. 

“I’m fine.” She assured, catching the man that had tried to kill Kakashi off guard. Channeling her chakra into her foot, Sakura kicked him square in the chest. She tried not to take joy in the feel of it crumpling under her force. 

“Sakura? Kakashi-Sensei?” Naruto questioned, easily taking out the last of their ambush. “Wha-” He looked between them confused. “It was you two the whole time!?”

“Are you okay?” Kakashi’s voice was lower, but easier to hear thanks to his proximity. Reaching up, he dabbed lightly at Sakura’s head. “You’re bleeding.” 

“It’s just a small cut.” Bringing a glowing hand to her forehead, she focused on healing the cut. “Are _you_ okay?”

“Thanks to you.”

“Why are you guys ignoring me!?” Naruto’s voice had begun to resemble a screech. “Just how long have you two been ANBU!?”

Sakura smiled as Inojin drew carefully on the placemat in front of him. When Ino asked Sakura to lunch, the kunoichi jumped at the chance to do something… normal. Though, seeing her friend shining in the light of motherhood, it made Sakura think. Maybe she was being too harsh on Sasuke? Maybe his anger had actually come from a place of worry? It wasn’t that Sakura didn’t want children, she just wanted to share the experience with someone. 

And then there was Kakashi... He and Sasuke were like little demons whispering in her ear. Sasuke offered everything Sakura had always wanted… Everything she had  _ thought _ she wanted. But Kakashi… Kakashi had opened her up to this whole new world. A world that Sakura could have never imagined being part of. Each time she got a taste of that darkness, she struggled not to take an entire bite. But… what was holding her back? Maybe it was the knowledge that she would have to choose. She couldn’t become a mother and indulge in the dark at the same time. The real problem was that Sakura knew which one held more appeal. 

“Earth to Forehead!” Ino waved a manicured hand in front of Sakura’s face. “Welcome back. I lost you there for a second.”

“Sorry.” Sakura blinked as Inojin looked up at her. “Ino… What was it like? Having Inojin?”

Ino shrugged. “I mean, it’s like they say. Once you have the baby, all the bad stuff is forgotten. The swollen ankles, the cravings, the moodswings… They’re all worth it when you hold them.” She reached over and smoothed down her son’s bright hair. “Why? Oh! _No_!” Her face went hard. “You are  _ not _ having his baby while he’s out doing Kami knows what!”

Sighing, Sakura shook her head. “I was thinking about it.” 

“Sakura!” Ino lowered her voice as they drew attention. “You know that we all love you and that we’d help any way we could, but you can’t go through that alone! Not when he has just as much responsibility as you!”

“I know…” She sighed, wincing a bit. Of course Ino would know how to voice the thoughts Sakura couldn’t. “Would it… would it be selfish of me to try and do some things on my own? Strikeout - get a little… wild?”

Ino’s eyes went wide as she reached over to cover Inojin’s ears. “Who did you fuck?”

“What!?” Sakura burned a bright red. “No one!”

Looking disappointed at the lack of gossip, Ino dropped her hands. “Well, if you ask me, you deserve a little… fun.” She eyed her son who now watched them intently. “I certainly wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to take your barbie to play in someone else’s dream home.”

How had they gotten here? Leave it to Ino to turn everything into sex. It certainly didn’t help that her words conjured images of Kakashi in the oasis.  _ No! _ She would  _ not _ crush on one of her best friends - because that was what he had become. “My barbies are firmly in their boxes.”

Rolling her eyes, Ino toyed around with her straw. “Just be careful, Sakura. We wouldn’t want them to get lonely and agree to Ken’s demands just for the sake of companionship.”

“Yeah. I’ll keep that in mind.” 

He was just getting to his favorite part of the book when he felt her chakra. Sakura, it seemed, was becoming a constant in Kakashi’s life. A fact that would have irritated him several months prior simply made the Copy Nin smile lightly behind his mask and close his book. She was on his fire escape, shifting around.  _ Probably debating on coming in or leaving _ , Kakashi thought to himself. Finally, Sakura made up her mind and ducked through his open window. 

“Hey!” She smiled widely, but he could practically feel the anxiety rolling off of her. Then again, Sakura always seemed to be anxious. The only time he had a peek behind that tough outer shell was the night he took her to the solstice festival. It had been… something.  _ Addicting _ \- the dark voice in his head supplied. “I’m not interrupting anything, am I?” She looked to the closed book between his fingers. 

“I’ve already read it. What brings you here, Sakura?” His voice was light to match the curl of his eyes. It was the version of him that Sakura would be most familiar with. Still, it didn’t seem to put her at ease. 

“I… I want you to teach me.”

“I believe I’ve already done that.”

Her cheeks flushed red and Kakashi felt the need to keep going. Luckily for Sakura, she cut him off. “I want you to teach me… I want to try it - being...  _ dark _ .” The word seemed foreign on her lips.

He hummed, eyes scanning her face as she shifted self-consciously. Kakashi much preferred it when she was carefree. Even the glimpses of Sakura’s ‘dark’ side were better than this… meek woman. The woman that only existed when Sasuke Uchiha was around. Recently, Kakashi began to wonder if he ever knew the real Sakura at all, or if he had only known the byproduct of Sasuke Uchiha’s presence. 

“Why?” He asked, his tone still light. 

“Why?” She pouted, seemingly not expecting that question. “Because I…” Sakura bit her lip and Kakashi’s eyes moved to it. “Because I don’t want to be consumed by this terrible feeling in my chest… Because for the first time in my adult life… I feel  _ alive _ .” 

That… that hurt him. He had been the one to mention that all-consuming darkness they all carried. Although Kakashi believed that Sakura needed to be aware of her feelings, he never wanted to be the one to point them out. “It’s not something that you can really teach, Sakura. If you want to be  _ dark _ , you just have to do it.”

“But… how can I if I don’t know what that means?”

“You  _ do _ know.” Kakashi stood, his head tilting slightly. “Remember that feeling you had when you danced to that music in Suna? You’d never heard it before, and you’d never seen the dance, but you did it anyway. Moreover, you  _ enjoyed _ it. If you want to be 'dark', you’ve got to be reckless - take chances.”

“Reckless…” She breathed, eyeing him. After a moment, Sakura’s face pulled into a smile that was almost ominous. “Okay. Let’s get tattoos!”

“I’m sorry, what?” Although his face was covered by his mask, Sakura could still see Kakashi’s confusion. “Did you just say ‘ _ let’s get tattoos’? _ ”

Trying not to smile too widely, Sakura nodded. “When you made that joke in Suna, for just a second, I panicked. It was something that got my heart racing. So… let’s get tattoos!”

Despite his apprehension, Sakura could tell that Kakashi was on the cusp of caving. “And there is nothing else that gets your heart racing?”

She tried not to blush as his deep eyes bore into her. “Look, I  _ cannot _ afford to let Barbie out of her box until I get my head on straight, so are you in or not, Hatake!?”

“I-” His brows furrowed in confusion. “I… yes?” Breathing a quick laugh, Kakashi shook his head. “Luckily for you, I know a guy.” 

As it turned out, Kakashi’s ‘guy’ was Genma. So, literally everyone’s ‘guy’. He was the one tasked with administering ANBU tattoos. Of course, the jerk was somewhat of a traditionalist, which meant that he only did them with a single senbon. If his work wasn’t impressive, Sakura might have insisted that they go somewhere else. 

Genma’s place was hardly what most would consider messy, but it did scream bachelor pad… loudly. Scrunching her nose at the pile of questionable magazines spread out over his coffee table, Sakura tried to focus on the pictures before her. The tattoo examples were pretty, if not plain. Some were just sketches that Genma himself had done. Others were photos of existing tattoos. It seemed in bad taste to copy someone’s tattoo, so Sakura skipped past those. 

“What about cherry blossoms.” Kakashi teased and pointed to a simple sketch of a branch covered in the bright pink flowers. “Those are nice.”

Leveling him with a look, Sakura scoffed. “You get them then. I’ve had enough association with them to last a lifetime.”

He hummed and leaned in to look at the sketch. “Yeah. Okay.”

“I wasn’t being serious!” Sakura protested as Genma slipped the sketch from its sleeve. “Wouldn’t you be embarrassed to walk around with a tattoo like that?” She tried, wondering if he was just trying to get a rise out of her. 

“It’s no worse than the shuriken on his ass.” Genma smirked around his senbon. 

Kakashi froze. Sakura froze. The world might have frozen. “You have a tattoo of a shuriken on your ass?”

“No.”

“Yes.” Genma barked a laugh, flipping over the page in his book and pointing to a picture of a small tattoo.

“Oh... _nooo_.” Sakura’s giggles quickly turned into rolling laughter as Kakashi pouted and looked away from the pair. 

“I lost a bet with Gai…” He huffed. “Should have never agreed to-”

“Okay.” Sakura nodded to it. “I feel a lot better about this now.” 

“Glad you do.” Kakashi murmured as he rolled up his sleeve so that Genma could hold the sketch against his forearm. Sakura would have never expected him to get it in such an obvious place. 

“What about a bunny?” Sakura decided with a small smile. Of course, only Kakashi knew that she liked bunnies because her ANBU mask was a rabbit. And the only reason Sakrua’s ANBU mask was a rabbit, was because Ibiki associated the animal with the kunoichi’s powerful kicks. 

“A bunny?” Genma asked with a raised brow. “Are you sure?”

Kakashi answered as Sakura bit her lip. “It’s perfect.” 

The tattoos took the rest of the day, and several hours more. Sakura should have expected as much, but despite the sitting time, she found herself… happy. She was happy to be doing something impulsive. She was happy to feed into that side of her that was all so new… She was happy to be with Kakashi. She couldn’t explain it, but ever since the two had been partnered up, Sakura felt… lighter. Maybe it was because for the first time in years, she had someone to laugh with. It wasn’t as if her friends had ignored her, but they had all moved on to their own families and lives. And honestly, Sakura had withdrawn in on herself. She felt selfish for wanting their time, and pathetic for needing it. But with Kakashi… It was almost like he needed her as much as she needed him. 

Sakura made sure that her shirt didn’t press too firmly onto her raw shoulder as she and Kakashi finally stepped out into the fresh night air. It had to be well past midnight, but Sakura felt like she had chewed a soldier pill. She felt… happy.

“I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.” Kakashi whined as he shoved his hands into his pockets and tilted his face skyward. “Want to have a late dinner?”

“I could eat.” Sakura attempted to come off indifferent as her stomach fought to be heard. “Nothing’s open though.” 

“I’ll cook.” Her feet faltered. Realizing that Sakura was no longer beside him, Kakashi hummed. “Come on. It’s not that hard to believe, is it?”

“You used to make me cook on every mission!” The kunoichi crossed her arms over her chest. “And you’re telling me that you actually possess the ability to cook?”

“Very well, I’ll have you know.” He hummed. “I happened to be busy keeping three Genin alive. The last thing I wanted to do was make dinner.”

With a scoff, they resumed their trek towards Kakashi’s apartment. “I guess we  _ were  _ pretty fragile back then.” She conceded. “But I was a terrible cook.”

“Yes, you were.” He chuckled as she punched his arm. “To be fair, you were never the homemaker type.”

Sakura frowned. Maybe that was why she was so bad at it now. “Where did you learn to cook?” She tried, hoping that he hadn’t caught her lapse in mood.

“After my father died, I had to learn.” The statement was sad, but Kakashi’s voice held no pain. “Not all of us could live off instant ramen.”

Sakura watched his profile in the glow of the moonlight. Kakashi had been through way more than any of them had realized at a young age. And yet… he always managed to smile for them. Despite his jokes about dealing with them as Genin, Sakura never felt safer than she did on a mission with Kakashi. Maybe that was what made her transition to ANBU so easy. If it were anyone else…

“You know, Kakashi… I never really thanked you.”

“Hmm?” His brow furrowed as he looked down at her. “Thanked me for what?”

Smiling, Sakura looked up at the bright night sky. “Everything.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Us @ Sakura regarding Sasuke
> 
> Are we… are we not swooning over Kakashi having a  _ sakura _ tattoo on his forearm??? Like…. Booiiiii I see you, I see you!


	6. Six

**Six**

Sakura shouldn’t have felt so unsure - not after years in the field. Sure, this mission was unlike any other that she had ever had to undertake, but to be  _ nervous _ ? It felt an awful lot like failure from where the kunoichi stood. Just this morning, Sakura’s biggest worry was that Sasuke had not returned when he said he would - though, that should hardly be a surprise anymore. Now… now she was on her way to torture someone. 

She hardly saw the fabric of their tent as she set it up. Behind her, Kakashi worked on preparing them a simple dinner. It would be their last night enroute before they made it to their target’s location. The man in question was an enemy of the village - a warmonger threatening to sell Konoha’s secrets to the highest bidder. Still, Sakura couldn’t imagine  _ actually  _ torturing someone. What would it entail? Would the man willingly give up his buyer? 

“You alright?” Kakashi called from behind her. “You’ve been staring at that tree for ten minutes.” 

Turning, Sakura found his assessing dark eyes. Kakashi was without his typical mask again, so she could easily watch as the corners of his full lips tugged downward. “I’ve never… I don’t know how to torture someone.”

Kakashi’s eyes softened, nearly creasing into his familiar smile. It reminded her of when he offered to kill Sasuke so that Sakura wouldn’t have to bear the burden. Knowing now about his history… it would have killed him. “You don’t have to, Sakura. I’ll take care of that part.”

“No.” She shook her head quickly. When Sakura was young, it was easy to rely on Kakashi. Now that she was older - his equal - it wasn’t fair to ask that of him. Why should he have to shoulder the weight of this mission alone? They were partners, after all. “I want to. I want to help.” She clarified when he raised an eyebrow. “I just… Don’t know what to do.”

It seemed that Sakura was always asking Kakashi to teach her something. It should have harkened back to her Genin days, and that alone should have quelled the fire in Sakura’s stomach as he stood… but it didn’t. Their relationship had always been so clear in her mind. He was her ex-sensei. The man that had taught her all the foundations that she needed to become the kunoichi she was today. But if that was the case, why did Sakura start viewing him in a way that she never thought she’d view anyone but Saskue? It wasn’t the exact same, granted, but it was there. 

Sasuke had always represented an ideal for Sakura. He was the golden goose - her happily ever after. When she thought of Sasuke, it was fuzzy and hopeful. Up until recently, Sakura thought that was a sign of true love. After all, that was the way the princess’ in the stories always felt. But lately… with Kakashi… 

Kakashi was like standing in the middle of a hurricane, trying to catch her breath as the wind whipped around her. It was like dancing in the middle of a foreign festival while the drums pounded in her head. What she felt for Kakashi wasn’t warm or fuzzy, it was pure adrenaline and… passion. It was dangerous.

“Okay.” He nodded, though Sakura had almost forgotten what they had been talking about. “I’ll teach you, but don’t feel like you have to do this, Sakura. It’s okay if you can’t.”

“I can handle it.” She hoped. 

With dark eyes, Kakashi took a step towards her. Although Sakura had never felt threatened by her ex-sensei, she found herself taking a step backwards. Something about him seemed to shift, and her body instinctually reacted. He took another step, and another. Sakura fought the urge to gasp as her back hit a tree. 

“Do you feel that?” He asked, dark eyes half-lidded, and glowing in the firelight. There were still a few feet between them, but Sakura was frozen. “That panic?”

Not trusting her words, Sakura swallowed and nodded. Leave it to Kakashi to jump into her ‘lesson’ with both feet. Though, if she were being honest with herself, Sakura would admit that the panic she felt was probably for a different reason than he intended. It had a lot more to do with the excitement his dark look caused than apprehension. 

“A lot of people think that torture is about pain, but the most important tool… is fear.” He took another step, practically pinning her in place with his proximity. “People will talk if they’re in pain, but they’ll spill their guts if they’re  _ anticipating _ it.”

Quick as lightning, Kakashi’s hand shot out and wrapped around the column of Sakura’s throat. Wide jade eyes stared upward as Kakashi took yet another step, leaving their bodies only centimeters apart. “Here… do you feel where my fingers are?” 

Sakura tried to breathe evenly through his tight grasp, but with the bark of the tree at her back, and the muscular expanse of Kakashi at her front, it was hard to think straight. “Yeah…” She breathed with difficulty. 

It probably should have scared her that Kakashi was slowly tightening his grip, but the throbbing between Sakura’s thighs told a different story. “Most people make the mistake of crushing the windpipe, but that just risks killing them too soon. If you squeeze the sides of the neck, you slow blood flow. It’s just enough to keep your mark aware, but dull his senses. Of course, too much, and they’ll pass out.”

His voice had grown deeper - almost husky. Although Kakashi’s fingers loosened after his ‘lesson’, his hand remained at Sakura’s throat. Her heart still raced in her chest as she wondered just  _ when _ their faces had gotten so close. Was he going to kiss her? Maybe that thought should have frightened her, but when his dark eyes dropped to her lips, Sakura all but purred.  _ Want _ . That was what she felt for him. Pure, unadulterated  _ want. _ She wanted Kakashi Hatake more than she had ever wanted any other man - including Sasuke. That was a loaded thought she was willing to put off dissecting until later. 

Just when Sakura thought he was going to close the gap between their lips, Kakashi cleared his throat and took a step backwards. She resisted the urge to feel her neck where his fingers had just been. “The rest is just improvising.” He cleared his throat again. “I have complete faith in you, Sakura.” With a smile that seemed a little too forced, he turned back to their campfire. What had just happened?

  
  


Sakura stared up at the ceiling, her legs flung across Naruto’s lap as he flipped through yet another book on laws and regulations. Hinata had taken the kids to the Hyuuga compound to see her father, and Naruto was using the opportunity to catch up on his Hokage studies. Sakura enjoyed his company, so didn’t mind when he showed up at her door, arms loaded down in paperwork. Typically, she enjoyed lazy days off like this, but ever since her last ANBU mission, Sakura couldn’t seem to focus on anything other than what had happened in the woods. 

“I think I want to sleep with Kakashi.” Sakura winced when the hardback fell from Naruto’s fingers to her ankles. Sitting up, she withdrew her legs to rub the reddened skin.

“What the  _ fuck _ , Sakura!?” It was rare to hear Naruto curse, though she supposed this was warranted. “You can’t just blurt something like that out!”

“I have no one else to talk to about this!” The kunoichi whined, frowning as he turned three shades of red. “You’re the only one that knows that we’re ANBU partners. And if I tried to talk to Ino, she’d find a way to get it out of me!”

“You can’t just -  _ sleep _ with Kakashi-Sensei.” Naruto turned, pulling one leg up onto the couch so he could face her. “I know Sasuke is gone a lot, but cheating on him won’t change that.” 

“It’s not about Sasuke.” Groaning, she ran her fingers through her wild pink hair. “I can’t explain it! I know we’ve only been partners for six months, but it’s like I’ve gotten to know a completely different side of him! There’s something about the way he-”

“Please don’t go into details.” Naruto’s face scrunched before settling into a pitying look. “Are you sure this isn’t just you, I don’t know, projecting or something? Like, because Sasuke isn’t around, you’re confusing your close friendship with Kakashi for something more?”

Damn, she hated that Naruto had grown up to be mature and rational. “No. I don’t know that’s not what this is.” Sakura sighed and fell back against the arm of the couch. “But the way he makes me feel, Naruto… It’s like I can fly when I’m with him.” 

The blond’s shoulders physically sank. “Even if what you feel for Kakashi-Sensei is real… it’s a bad idea. It’s not just something you can do and walk away from, you know? You’d still have to face Sasuke, and it could ruin your relationship with both of them.” He reached out to grab Sakura’s hands, his eyes pleading. “Best case scenario, Kakashi-Sensei could still get in a lot of trouble. There are some  _ serious  _ laws against sensei-student relationships. Even if he’s not your sensei anymore.” 

Sakura hadn’t thought about any of that. She had been so caught up in the feeling of being free, that she didn’t want to acknowledge reality. “I guess you’re right.” Working up a smile, she squeezed Naruto’s hand back. “Thanks for talking some sense into me, Naruto.”

Grinning widely and scratching the back of his head, Naruto shrugged. “I figured I owed you from all those times you stopped me from doing something stupid.”

Sakura smiled, hoping silently that the sane part of her brain would win this internal battle. 

  
  


Silently, Sakura wondered when Kakashi had become such a fixture in her life. In the beginning of their partnership, they tended to only really talk when out on a mission. As time went on, it was like they couldn’t go more than a day without seeing each other. Which was probably why it felt like the most natural thing in the world when he landed on the roof beside her. 

Sakura tended to spend most nights on the roof of her home until the pull of sleep couldn’t be ignored. At first, it was because the house, small as it was, felt too big and too empty when it was just her. After a while, it became a nightly ritual. It was only over the last two weeks that Kakashi started to join her on occasion. 

“You look upset.” He said simply, even though his eyes never left his book. 

How was it that after all these years, Kakashi was still so observant. “How do you do it? Separate the dark side and the light side? How do you know where that line is?”

Sensing the conversation was serious, Kakashi lowered his book. “Ah. Well, that’s simple. There isn’t one.” He smiled behind his mask. “You can’t look at it as having two different sides, Sakura. Everybody’s got light and dark in them. If you keep trying to split yourself in two, you’ll never find that balance.”

Sakura bit her lip. How could that be true? She felt like there were  _ constantly  _ two sides of her struggling for dominance. “Then how do you know what impulses to act on? When to take those risks?”

Though her voice had been gentle, it seemed to hold enough weight to thicken the air around them. With an unreadable expression, Kakashi reached out to tuck a stray bubblegum stand behind Sakura’s ear. “That’s simple too. When the reward outweighs the risk.” 

Reason one to not sleep with Kakashi - she was married. Reason two - Kakashi was her ex-sensei. Reason three - if she had been making it all up in her head, she could ruin their friendship. Reason four - if she  _ hadn’t _ been making it up, there could be serious consequences. The list went on and on. Though the practical part of Sakura’s mind begged for reason, the new, freer side begged for release. That was probably why, despite the perpetually growing list, Sakura found herself staring up at Kakashi’s open window. 

_ It’s late - maybe he’s asleep _ , the last shred of her sanity tried as her fists curled at her sides. But his window was still open, and there was a faint glow behind the sheer curtains. This was stupid, and reckless, and… risky. 

Sakura held her breath as she moved upward, her brain practically detaching - as if it wanted nothing to do with this idiocy. She slipped through the open window noiselessly, her breath stuck in her throat.

Kakashi laid in bed, propped against his headboard. She obviously caught him right before bed, because his mask and shirt were gone, leaving him in only a worn pair of shuriken pajama bottoms. For once, he seemed surprised to see her. The hand that balanced his favorite  _ Icha Icha _ on his stomach slowly fell at the site of her.

Sakura almost begged for him to say something. Yes, she might have been the one to barge in on him in the middle of the night, but she didn’t know how to voice the anxiety running through her veins. Her whole life had been a lie. Her goals had been trivial. She was back in the hurricane, but this time she couldn’t tell which way was up. All Sakura knew was that Kakashi was the only one that could understand. 

“I… shouldn’t be here.” She breathed, her voice delicate and low. “I should go…”

She watched as his tongue ran over his bottom lip, those charcoal eyes deep and knowing. “Yes.”

She might have physically shivered at the deep huskiness in his tone. “You should tell me to go.”

“... Yes.” He breathed again, assessing her. 

Sakura wanted to sob; out of pleasure, out of pain - it didn’t matter. If she didn’t turn around and leave,  _ everything _ would change, and she still hadn’t decided if that was a good thing or not. “Would the risk be worth the reward?”

Kakashi’s eyes softened, but there was something dark within them. “Yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Kakashi:** *pins Sakura to a tree by the throat*
> 
> **Us:**
> 
> I don’t think you guys are emotionally prepared for the next chapter xD Let’s just say things are going to get… verbal…


	7. Seven

**Seven**

“Would the risk be worth the reward?”

Kakashi’s eyes softened, but there was something dark within them. “Yes.”

She might have gasped because of his answer. She might have gasped because up until then, she had forgotten to breath. Kakashi didn’t seem to mind. He simply kept watching her with that unyielding, fathomless gaze. He was the first to move - slowly discarding his book on the simple nightstand that held the room’s lone lamp. 

Finding her eyes again, Kakashi held one hand extended. “Sakura… come here.” 

Luckily for the kunoichi, her feet remembered how to work before her brain did. It felt surreal as her knees hit the mattress and kept moving. The logical side of her brain was screaming now. How long had it been since she had been with a man? Too long. _Much_ , much too long. When she was close enough, Kakashi grabbed her by the waist, pulling until she was straddling his lap. The movement was so quick and unexpected, Sakura almost gasped again. 

“What do you need, Sakura?” He asked, voice husky as his hands worked to push long pink locks from her face. “Tell me what you need.”

What did she need? It was a heavy question with multiple answers. She needed to breathe - to live. She needed stability - to not feel like it was natural to be straddling her ex-sensei as her body begged for more. She needed to understand how it had led to this. Because she couldn’t voice all of her worries, Sakura gave him the only answer that made sense. “You.” 

With a hand at the base of her neck, Kakashi pulled her in for a searing kiss. The feel of his lips were unlike anything Sakura had ever known. It was like finding an anchor in the storm - like falling from the crest of a giant wave. It was like… living. 

Never in a million years could Sakura have imagined they would end up here, but it was exactly where she needed to be. A small moan pressed through her lips as his large hands ran along the length of her spine. How many times had she watched those talented hands and they flew through complicated jutsu, or protected her from an enemy? How many times in the last month had she imagined them touching her like this? Because it was Kakashi, he seemed to understand that she needed more. It wasn’t enough to be anchored in the hurricane, she wanted it to sweep her away. She wanted to be part of it. 

Her eyes opened just enough to find those familiar charcoal orbs as Kakashi nipped at her bottom lip. His fingers had moved to her collarbone, lingering there for only a moment before reaching the neck of her simple summer dress. Sakura hadn’t thought of anything more than Konoha’s unseasonable fall heat when she tossed the garment on. Now, she was thankful for the minimal layers. Her breath came in small gasps as those long, calloused fingers tugged at the thin fabric, ripping it in two down to her navel. Before Sakura could protest - though it barely crossed her mind - his lips were on the skin of her neck. 

“Beautiful…” Kakashi breathed as his teeth skimmed her clavicle. “Do you have any idea how long I’ve pictured you like this?” He moaned, his fingers digging into Sakura’s waist as he bucked upward. She gasped as the hard length of him ran over her core. 

“I-I need-” She couldn’t form the words. How could she explain how desperately she needed him?

Kakashi seemed to understand, because he kissed her soundly. “That’s okay. When I’m done with you, all you’ll be able to say is my name anyway.” 

She moaned at his words, her head falling back just as he pressed the cup of her bra out of the way. Swollen lips parted in a silent prayer as his talented mouth worked over her breasts, his teeth teasing her deliciously. 

“Look at me, Sakura.” Her head was too heavy, but she managed to find his gaze anyway. “Do you want it rough?”

Her whole body shivered as he bucked upwards again. Licking her dry lips, Sakura nodded. “Please… Kakashi…” 

She was moved so quickly that the room seemed to spin. Kakashi had managed to flip her while moving to his knees. Later, Sakura would probably be embarrassed by the fact that she was half-dressed and on all fours like a dog in heat. But for now, she simply curled her fingers in the plushness of Kakashi’s blanket as he grabbed a fistful of pink hair. A sound somewhere between a hiss and moan pushed past Sakura’s throat as he yanked, turning her head sideways so she could see him. 

“Do you have any idea what you’ve been doing to me?” Kakashi growled, pressing against her backside so she could _feel_ what he meant. “Day in, day out… All I can think about is watching you come apart on my cock. Wanting to fuck you had become the center of my focus.” 

The hand that didn’t hold her hair pushed the fabric of her dress upward until her lacy panties were on display. “No one has ever said they wanted me before…” Sakura admitted in a groan, her eyes nearly rolling back into her head as he rubbed the wet fabric under his fingertips. 

They faltered for only a moment at her confession. “Sasuke is a fucking idiot.” He folded himself over Sakura to kiss her roughly, his fingers pulling harder at her roots. “If you were mine, I’d fuck you until you couldn’t walk.” The sound of Kakashi’s voice and deepness of his eyes was nearly enough to undo her then and there. “But we’ll have to settle for this right now.” 

Sakura gasped as he pushed her underwear aside and entered her without warning. Finally, Kakashi released her hair to grab her hips with both hands. Resisting the urge to drop to her forearms, Sakura closed her eyes as they crossed. Over and over, Kakashi pulled nearly all the way out before slamming back into her. 

“K-akashi!” She breathed his name, pressing back to aid his rhythm. 

“Again, Sakura… Scream my name.” He growled as his fingers dug into her sides. 

“Ka-kashi!” She spoke louder, twisting to look at him over her shoulder. 

Kakashi was… _beautiful_. Hard angles, and unhinged aggression. If Sakura had thought that he was like a wild animal in his natural habitat before, _this_ Kakashi was so much more raw. His neck flexed, his teeth bared… he was a controlled explosion… the eye of the hurricane. 

No matter what happened to Sakura after this, there would be no forgetting him. She could live a hundred lifetimes with a hundred lovers, and this would be the only thing she would remember. Unable to stare at him for a moment longer, Sakura turned and cried out as he moved even faster. 

“That’s it…” Kakashi cooed, though his voice was even rougher than before. “Come for me, Sakura. I want to see if it matches the image in my head.” 

“Kakashi!” She screamed his name this time, the end drifting off into a cry as her body seized and tipped over the edge. 

As he joined her in oblivion, Kakashi folded his body over hers, the warmth of his bare chest burning into her back and memory. _This_ had been what she needed. A release. A dark release with the only man that could ever understand this side of her. As Kakashi braced himself to ride out his orgasm, Sakura caught sight of the cherry blossom tattoo on his forearm and smiled. Maybe she was in deeper than she realized.

Sakura laid on her stomach and forearms as she watched the smoke curl upwards from Kakashi’s cigarette. He laid in the same position Sakura had found him in - propped against the headboard. They only moved enough to lay out next to each other, not exchanging a word as they did so. For Sakura, it was hard to say _anything_ . She could have never imagined Kakashi talking like _that_ \- not that she was complaining. In fact, he might have ruined regular sex for her. 

“Do you regret it?” She spoke softly into the quiet of the room. 

Slowly, his half-lidded eyes found her face. “No.” The corners of his lips twitched upward. “Maybe I should feel guilty, but I don’t. Do you?”

Sakura bit her lip and shook her head. “No. I know it can’t happen again, but... I don’t regret a second of it.” 

There was a silent understanding between the two. With Sakura’s marriage and Kakashi’s position as her ex-sensei, carrying on would be nothing but trouble… no matter how much it appealed to Sakura’s darker half. She had hoped that sleeping with Kakashi would get him out of her system, but now she worried it would become a new obsession. 

“You owe me a dress.” He snorted and stubbed out his cigarette as he stood. Sakura watched as his bare back flexed with every movement as he rifled through his dresser. A moment later, a Jonin shirt was tossed her way. Slipping it on, Sakura stood too. “I should get going. I’m working at the hospital this week.”

“Don’t forget Natuto’s birthday party Thursday.”

She gave a short laugh, knowing full well that Kakashi would only show up late and drop off a gift before leaving. Maybe it should have been awkward between them, but it felt like nothing had changed as Kakashi slipped into bed and picked up the book he had been reading when she arrived. 

“ _You_ don’t forget to be on time.” When he looked up, they exchanged a small smile. 

Sakura’s remained all the way home. 

Sakura laughed as Naruto opened yet another voucher for Ichiraku Ramen. It seemed that most of his friends had come up with the same gift idea - not that he seemed to mind. His induction as the Sixth Hokage was right around the corner, and he seemed to be enjoying his free time until then. 

“You would think he’d be sick of ramen!” Ino scoffed as she took a dainty sip of whatever concoction she had managed to make after her recent trip to the open bar. “I don’t know how you put up with him, Hinata.” 

The woman blushed lightly and tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear. “It makes grocery shopping easier.” On her lap, Himawari giggled. “I’m just glad to see him so happy. Naruto has put his heart and soul into becoming Hokage. I’m worried that once he is, it won’t live up to his imagination.”

“Well, if anyone can handle it, it’s Naruto.” Sakura smiled as she stood. 

The party had been going on for hours, and it was almost time for her to sneak out the back door. It wasn’t anything personal to Naruto or her friends, but with her hospital shifts all week, there wouldn’t be any time for rest before her next ANBU mission. Just earlier that day, Tsunade informed Sakura that she and Kakashi would be going undercover to track down a group of missing nin that had been kidnapping babies from a small village. Intelligence believes that they are being sold to families in wealthy nations that cannot have their own children. It meant that Sakura not only had to go undercover, but do so with a false stomach. 

“You wouldn’t be sneaking out, would you.” A deep voice spoke against the shell of her ear. “That’s very rude, Sakura.” 

She resisted the urge to bite her lip as Kakashi’s warm breath ghosted over her skin. Although Sakura didn’t feel guilt for her _indiscretion_ , she did feel it for the fact that she wanted him again. Once wasn’t enough to scratch that itch Sakura constantly felt under her skin, but she worried twice would just make it worse. “You sure you should talk?” She spoke with a smile before turning to look up at him. “You made it before sundown. Are you going soft?”

Sakura’s chest seemed to freeze and then contract as his onyx eyes skimmed the length of her body before finding her face. “Unfortunately not.” He held her gaze for a moment longer before his eyes crinkled in a familiar fashion. “I heard that Tsunade spoke to you. We should probably have a briefing before heading out. We’ll have to travel as civilians.”

“Yeah she mentioned that.” Sakura cleared her throat and tried to match his level of false cheer. “You could come by the hospital around lunch tomorrow? I have a free hour.”

“Ah. It’s a date.” He teased with a small smile. 

“Kakashi-Sensei!” Naruto barreled into them before Sakura could think of a response. Ever since Sakura’s little confession to Naruto, the blond made it a point to always stand between her and Kakashi when he was around. Sakura knew that he meant well, but it only served to up the taboo factor of it all. “Can you believe I’m twenty-seven! You must feel really old!”

With a glare, Sakura smacked the back of Naruto’s head. “You idiot! That’s such a rude thing to say to someone!”

“Ah. It’s no big deal.” Kakashi smiled in his familiar way and scratched the back of his neck. “I like to think I have the stamina of a man half my age.” His words were innocent enough, but Sakura felt a hot blush creep up her neck. 

“Well, I feel a hundred!” Naruto seemed to miss the exchange as he practically slumped over. “All this Hokage stuff is no joke.” Looking between the two, he dropped his voice. “Try to finish your mission before my induction, okay? I want you there! Even Sasuke is going to make it back, so no excuses!”

“Sasuke is coming back?” Kakashi and Sakura said at the same time. They blinked at each other before looking to Naruto.

“Uh-yeah. I thought he would have told you, Sakura…”

“No…” She bit the inside of her lip. “He didn’t.” She assumed that when he didn't show up after seeing her in Suna, he wouldn't be back for another six months.

“Maybe he wanted it to be a surprise.” Naruto tried with a smile. “He said that he’d probably be sticking around for a while this time!” The smile on Sakura’s face shouldn't have been so forced… and the news shouldn’t have filled her with dread. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo, for real tho… I think this is the smuttiest scene I’ve written for a fic lol. I usually try to hold back, and I had to reel some of the dirty talk in, but damn… Did I mention Dark!Kakashi could get it?? I know my timeline is a little off, but shhhhh Us
> 
> @ Sakura finally getting what she wants
> 
> Official theme song for this fic is **[Camila Cabello’s My Oh My](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PD6FGEmhmDE)**
> 
> _He's only here for one thing, but (So am I)_
> 
> _Yeah, a little bit older, a black leather jacket_
> 
> _A bad reputation, insatiable habits_
> 
> _He was onto me, one look and I couldn't breathe, yeah_
> 
> _I said, if he kissed me, I might let it happen_
> 
> _(Oh) I swear on my life that I've been a good girl_
> 
> _(Oh) Tonight, I don't wanna be her_


	8. Eight

**Eight**

When Sakura was finally able to fall asleep, it was anything but restful. Sasuke was coming home. More importantly, he was coming home to _stay_. For years, that had been Sakura’s lone desire. She wanted nothing more than her husband by her side every morning and every night… but what now? Would he demand that she leave ANBU so that they could start their family? Wasn’t that exactly what Sakura had bargained for? She had made such a big deal about him sticking around to start a family, that she didn’t know how to tell him that she wasn’t sure she wanted one… Not with him. 

Had one taste of the forbidden fruit been enough to undo a lifetime’s worth of commitment? Sakura couldn’t blame Sasuke for the way he treated their marriage. He had never lied about his intentions or feelings. He had never promised her warmth and affection; she had just assumed that those things would come with the marriage. Was it really fair of her to turn him away for being exactly what she had always known him to be? It wasn’t like they were children anymore. Sasuke was the last of his clan, and as his wife, Sakura had a duty to help him restore it. Had she been selfish in only thinking of herself?

“That’s some face you’ve got there.” Sakura blinked at the sound of a voice other than the one in her head. She had been staring at the same form for the last hour, her mind reeling in the silence of her office. 

“Kakashi.” She smiled lightly at the man perched carefully at her windowsill. “I got lost in thought.”

“Maybe I _am_ a bad influence.” He joked lightly as he hopped down, raising a single brow as he did so. “Want to talk about it?”

Sakura snorted as she stood and turned to her wall of filing cabinets. The form would have to wait another day. “I don’t even want to _think_ about it. I’ve never been very good at turning my brain off.” She spoke off-handedly as she slipped the paper where it belonged. 

Sakura’s fingers clenched around the cabinet handle as his heat seemed to seep into her back. It was a feeling she was sure that she’d never forget. “Kakashi…” She whispered his name as he brushed her hair back and over one shoulder. “What are you doing?”

“Helping you turn your brain off.” He said simply, his bare lips moving across Sakura’s neck. 

“We shouldn’t…” Despite her protest, Sakura leaned her head to the side as Kakashi nibbled at her earlobe. “We said it couldn’t happen again… and I’m at work…” Her voice held no conviction, and her eyes had closed. 

“Ah. Technically, _you_ said it couldn’t happen again.” A shiver ran down her spine as he pressed the length of his body against hers. “Let’s face it, Sakura. We’re on a time limit. With Sasuke returning, how much longer do you think we’ll be partners?”

“I-” She couldn’t argue with him because she had been thinking the very same thing. Giving up, Sakura let her head fall to Kakashi’s chest as his hands pushed the edge of her dress upward. “I need you…”

“I know…” His voice was only a whisper. “I…” He didn’t finish his thought, choosing instead to flip Sakura around and kiss her deeply. 

Her sounds of want and pleasure were swallowed by his skilled mouth as his rough hands slid under the hem of her dress. Never again would Sakura wear pants - she was swearing them off. The cabinets at her back gave a clatter of protest as Kakashi grasped the back of her thighs, effortlessly hoisting her up. On instinct, her legs wrapped around his narrow waist. Would the feel of his hot breath and short stubble across her skin ever grow old? Would there ever be a day where she didn’t long for the sharp sting of his long fingers in her tender flesh?

Deciding to be proactive, Sakura reached between them to work frantically on his belt as his lips moved to the sensitive skin of her neck. She knew he would leave a mark - one she would be forced to erase. It would be worth it, for just one more taste. 

“You’re ruining me.” She groaned as she finally popped the button on his pants. “I’ll never be able to go back to the way I was.”

“I’m setting you free.” Kakashi corrected, and he was right. This was what freedom tasted like. 

This time, when he entered her, Sakura got to look into his eyes. She got to watch the beautiful symphony of emotions play across his sharp features as they worked towards the same desperate goal. And as they crossed that finish line together, she got to taste his lips and wonder if she’d ever feel this complete again. 

“I’d almost prefer the hood in Suna.” Sakura groaned as she strapped her fake belly on. The wig had been annoying enough, and the edges itched her forehead. At least in that, she wasn’t alone. Ibiki had been clear - they were both to be _blond_. Apparently, blond babies were targeted more. 

“You’re being dramatic again, Sakura.” Kakashi hummed in a sing-song voice as he flipped the page of his book. Glaring at his reflection in the full-length mirror (though he wouldn’t see it), Sakura situated the final strap. 

“You wouldn’t be saying that if you were the one wearing this heavy pregnancy belly.”

“I could give it a try, but I think our cover would be blown.” He finally looked up, eyes creasing in a dimpled smile. 

It shouldn’t have been as easy as it was to slip into their old friendship. They had spent three days on the road, and yet had managed to avoid talking about what had happened in Sakura’s office. They took separate watches, and made small talk during meals. It was like she had made the whole thing up. Maybe, part of her would have believed that… if not for the lingering touches. They were simple, hardly noticeable unless someone was looking for them. Kakashi would graze her arm, and his fingers would drag across her skin. She would pick a leaf from his hair (wig), and not immediately retreat. It was… odd. Sakura didn’t know if she should talk about it, or pretend it didn’t happen. With every passing day, Sasuke’s return grew to be more daunting. 

Sakura wasn’t so delusional as to think that Kakashi felt more than lust for her. She couldn’t throw away her marriage for a couple of heated nights and filthy words… but she was beginning to wonder if there was even anything _to_ throw away. Those two nights - those filthy words - they made her feel closer to Kakashi than she ever had to Sasuke. 

She shook from her thoughts as Kakashi stood, checking that his scar was fully covered over her shoulder. Not that many people had ever seen his face, so it wasn’t like they’d be able to pick him out regardless. His deep eyes met hers, and a soft smile eased the hard lines of his face. Had he always smiled so sweetly at her? Was she making this up too?

“We should get going.” He sighed, nodding towards the door of ‘their apartment’. 

The town’s leader had set up a small studio for them to use as a base as they integrated into the faux life they had created. The fact that Sakura was playing Kakashi’s wife only served to mess with her head further. But she was a professional, and he was her partner. A simple screw up could land them both in hot water. The mission had to come first. She wondered silently, as she checked for her concealed kunai, if that was why Sasuke stayed away as much as he did. 

Although winter was in full force, it didn’t seem to stop the citizens from hitting the market stalls. The town of Jeinin was small, but served as a central trading hub. It was probably how their targets were able to snatch women and children without being seen. People came and went so often, that no one face was familiar to the locals. 

Kakashi placed a warm hand on the small of Sakura’s back as he guided them through the overpacked main street. Very much playing the part of the doting husband, he ducked to speak softly in Sakura’s ear. “All of the missing girls disappeared on this street. We have to assume that it’s someone local - someone that knows the area.”

Sakura nodded, smiling at a woman when she apologized for bumping into them. The combined sound of dozens of voices at once was nearly deafening. How were they supposed to find their target in a sea of potential ones? Remembering her role, Sakura rubbed her hand over her fake belly. Hopefully, he would come to them. 

“Is he kicking?” Kakashi asked, nearly taking Sakura off guard. They were in the center of the market strip now, standing just off to the side of the busy foot traffic. A quick look from Kakashi told her to play along. He was drawing attention. 

Sakura watched with shallow breath as he dropped to one knee, placing a hand on either side of the fake belly before leaning in to kiss it. Instantly, something in Sakura snapped. He was talking to their ‘baby’ now, his thumbs moving in delicate circles. It was… breathtaking. It was the only word that could fit the sight of Kakashi Hatake playing the role of excited father-to-be. For a moment - a single, heart-stopping moment, Sakura forgot that it wasn’t real. She looked away as her eyes began to sting, searching the crowd for any onlookers. Kakashi wasn’t her husband, and he _wouldn’t_ be the father of her children. To even think-

“It’s such a wonderful time!” A sweet voice pulled her attention. The stall-owner to their right, a lovely woman with a belly as round as Sakura’s, smiled softly. “This is my second. What about you?”

“Our first.” Sakura smiled as Kakashi stood, wrapping an arm around her. He smelled of soap, and tobacco, and… something uniquely him. “We’re pretty nervous.” She tried to explain away her jarred nerves. 

“Nothing to worry about!” The brunette waved her hand dismissively. “My name is Kunuma. Are you two new in town?”

“We just moved here from Lightning.” Kakashi offered with Sakura’s favorite crooked smile. “I’m Kai. This is my wife, Saki.” 

“Let me guess, newlyweds?” Kunuma smiled, her deep violet eyes sparking. “I can tell by the way you two interact. My husband used to be all over me too.” She rolled her eyes and waved off whatever thought followed. “Now, I can’t even get him to help with dinner.”

Sakura gave a courtesy laugh as she tried not to dwell on the other woman’s words. “Is it always this busy here?”

“Oh, for sure!” Kunuma nodded. “It can be hard to adjust, but lucky for you, you made another mommy friend!” She grabbed a piece of paper and quickly scribbled an address down. “The market is closed on Sunday’s. Come by tomorrow for tea - both of you!” She insisted, handing the paper to Sakura. 

“We’d love to.” 

Sakura twisted and stretched as her burden in the form of a fake stomach fell noisily to the floor. They had been in Jeinin for a week now, and there was no sight of their target. When her back let out a satisfying _pop_ , she sighed and allowed her arms to fall at her sides. Only when she was situated again did Sakura catch sight of Kakashi watching her. 

“What?” She asked, trying not to smile at the unruly state the wig had left his hair in. He had recently stubbed out a cigarette, and the remainder of the smoke swirled heavily in the still air. 

Her amusement faded as those dark eyes raked over her body before landing on her face. “Come here.” Instantly, she was reminded of that first night. 

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” His eyes were heavy, and his voice gravily. Whatever Kakashi was thinking would only lead to something inappropriate - something Sakura couldn’t stop thinking about since they had arrived. 

“No.” He replied, his tone a bit lighter. “But I want to touch you.” 

Well… how could she say no to that? Slowly, Sakura’s legs carried her across the room and around the large bed. When her feet came to a stop, Kakashi shifted so that his knees were on either side of her. Slowly, and far more gently than she had been expecting, he reached out to tug her forward by the hem of her simple tee. Sakura’s knees brushed the rough quilt as Kakashi’s hands glided to press into each hip. 

She didn’t speak as they shifted downward, his touch almost a light breath as his rough fingers hit the bare skin of her thigh. This… wasn’t what Sakura had been expecting. She bit her lip as he pulled her flush with his body before placing a lingering kiss in the middle of her chest.

“W-what?” Sakura blinked, unable to form any other words.

“I’m touching you.” Kakashi hummed matter-of-factly, placing another kiss right under where the first had been. “Hasn’t anyone ever touched you like this?”

“No…” The admission made her breath catch. No one had ever touched her so… tenderly. Like they wanted more than sex. Once again, Kakashi brought out a side of Sakura she hadn’t known existed. The darkness was starting to feel like something else - something that both frightened and excited the kunoichi. “Kakashi… do you - does this happen a lot? With your partners or-” Realizing that she was sounding almost desperate, Sakura stopped. 

Pulling back just far enough to rest his chin on her chest, Kakashi looked up at her. “Kiss them? Considering my partner before you was Gai...” He smiled until his cheek dimpled, and then his expression grew serious - almost contemplative. “No, Sakura. You… You’re an anomaly.” 

“We’re in trouble, aren’t we?” Sakura breathed the question as her hands moved to his broad shoulder, the heat under her hands comforting, despite her words. 

“Yeah.” He confirmed, closing his eyes as Sakura’s fingers moved to his unruly hair. “I think we are.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sakura’s selfless to the point of frustration sometimes. I woulda bounced after the whole   
>  “You’re being hysterical, Sakura.” thing. IJS
> 
> Wassthis?? Two smut(ish) scenes back-to-back, and a play on the secret dating trope? I went all in on this one guys ;D
> 
> I really like writing Sakura coming around to the idea of leaving Sasuke. More than telling a story of romance, or infidelity, I like writing about her getting to know herself. Because at the end of the day, that is the most important part. 


	9. Nine

**Nine**

  
  


No matter how much Sakura enjoyed looking at Kakashi’s face, there was something warm and familiar about the appearance of his old mask. As he sat on the couch reading, he unconsciously closed his scarred eye. It had taken some convincing to get him to agree to Sakura meeting with Kunuma alone, but she appealed to his shinobi side. They had a mission to complete, and as long as they kept facing their problem with the same old tricks, it wouldn’t get solved. Maybe if Sakura spoke to Kunuma as one ‘mother’ to another, she would open up about all of the kidnappings. 

“I’m going to take my kunai, but that’s about all I can fit on me.” Sakura huffed, strapping the weapons under her false stomach. “I’ll touch base via radio in two hours time.” As Sakura turned to collect her bag, the air shifted around her. Just as Kakashi’s body heat registered, she turned to look up at him. 

“Be safe.” He said plainly, but his dark eyes narrowed with an unreadable emotion. Leaning in, he pressed a masked kiss to her forehead. 

Sakura smiled as Kunuma topped off her tea. This was only the second time that she had been in the other woman’s house, but it already felt cozy and familiar. She was that type of person, it seemed. The type that welcomed people in and made them feel at home. 

“Where is the little one today?” Sakura asked as she sipped the tea. “I was hoping to meet him this time - get some practice in.”

“Off with his father again. I swear, that new park in town is a blessing.” Laughing, she sat opposite the kunoichi. “Don’t worry, there will be plenty of learning on the job. The good news is that after the morning sickness, heartburn, and migraines, a baby is a vacation.”

“To be honest… I’m kind of nervous.” Sakura frowned, calling on all of her acting ability. “I’ve heard some… things. Things about how pregnant women have been going missing?”

“Oh, that.” Kunuma frowned, setting down her own tea cup. “Unfortunately, the rumors are true. The local authorities are working to catch the men responsible, though! And you don’t have too much to be worried about. They seem to only want foreigners - travelers. You’re a local now!”

Sakura had zoned out a bit as Kunuma spoke, so she shook her head. “I supp-” Her voice trailed off as she felt the heavy weight of an unknown drug. As she stretched her chakra outward, trying to identify the forign substance, she glared at Kunuma. “You?”

“I’m sorry…” The other woman’s eyes grew watery. “It was the only way they would let me keep my baby. I don’t have a husband, or anyone! Just this little girl.” Her hands moved over her stomach. “I’m sorry.” She repeated as Sakura’s vision went dark. 

The world around her came into a blurry focus, setting Sakura’s nerves on edge. Even as the panic kicked her shinobi instincts into high gear, her body was slow to respond. Luckily for the ex-medic nin, she had managed to burn off enough of the poison that her body seemed to recover fairly quickly. Still, she remained unmoving as muffled voices echoed nearby. Chancing keeping one eye open, Sakura tried to make sense of her surroundings. She was in some kind of cell - underground if the temperature of the air was anything to go by. Her fake belly had been removed, as well as her wig. With a curtain of pink obscuring most of her vision, Sakura tried to narrow in on the speaking figure. 

“You brought me a Leaf shinobi! She’s not even pregnant!” His anger was palpable. 

“I-I didn’t know!” Kunuma - or whatever her name really was - spoke in a shaky voice. 

“If you don’t find me a replacement, I’ll cut that one out of your stomach! Do you hear me!?” As he raised his hand, Sakura pushed herself to sit up.

The movements were sluggish and shaky, made all the more pathetic by the rattling of heavy chains strapped to her wrists. It was enough to distract the man before he could follow through with his slap. He was handsome - unexpectedly so. Even in his anger, his features were aesthetically pleasing. It was probably how he was able to lure so many women. That, and Kunuma. She didn’t recognise him from any BINGO books, and he didn’t wear a headband, but his chakra was strong and much more plentiful than Sakura’s at the moment. She would need time to regain her strength. In the meantime, she could do some reconnaissance. At the very least, it would give Kakashi time to find her. 

“You’re already awake.” He hissed, eyes narrowing further. “I guess I should have expected that from one of Konoha’s ANBU.” He nodded to where Sakura’s (now) oversized shirt hung from her shoulder, displaying her tattoo. 

“Happy to represent the organization well.” Sakura breathed, wincining as she settled. “So, you’re the one behind all of this? I would have thought it was more than a one-man operation.”

“Nice try.” He chuckled darkly as he crouched on the other side of the cell bars. “I know what you’re doing - trying to size up my numbers and take me out. Only, I have an advantage that you don’t. I know who your partner is.” 

With a light, tired laugh, Sakura rested her head against the cool bars. “Word of advice? He’s already going to be pretty upset that I missed my check in. You’re  _ not  _ gonna want to push him into angry territory.”

“Ooh!” The man made a faux scared face. “I’m not scared of you, or your little friend. I suggest you be a good girl so that I don’t have to send you back to Konoha piece by piece.”

Kakashi used his old cigarette to light a second. She was late radioing in. Now, he had to war with himself whether to overreact, or wait around. Sakura was hardly ever late with check in’s, but there was also a chance she couldn’t get away. And  _ why _ was he so worried? It wasn’t like this was the first time he had a partner act alone. It certainly wasn’t the first time someone was late checking in. So why was it different this time?

Well, that was obvious. Because it was Sakura. Because he was… Shaking his head, Kakashi pushed the thought away. It didn’t matter; she wasn’t his. She had promised herself to the last Uchiha many years ago. Even if she hadn’t, there was too much standing between them. That was why, no matter how strong they were, Kakashi couldn’t trust his feelings. 

A knock at the door pulled his attention. Covering his head with a towel, he discarded his cigarette, batting away the smoke. When he opened it to find a crying Kunuma on the other side, fear gripped at Kakashi’s throat and chest. 

“Please… whoever you really are… I need your help.” 

She could use her seal - the thought occurred to Sakura for the tenth time. But that would be three years of work down the drain. Besides, her strength was slowly returning. She had to have been in this holding cell for at least four hours, which meant Kakashi was looking for her. There was something comforting in that thought. He wouldn’t let her down - he never had. People came and went from Sakura’s life, but Kakashi was always there when she needed him. Even when she left his tutelage to study under Tsunade, he would check in on her. She would make it out of this just fine. 

“I’ve done some research, pinkie!” The man had left after threatening Sakura, but now he seemed to be in a much better mood. “Sakura Uchiha!” He laughed, clapping his hands once before resuming his crouched position. “I wonder how much Sasuke Uchiha would give to get his precious wife back.”

“Probably less than you’d think.” She offered dryly, eyes staring listlessly up at his smirking face. Before anything else could be said, a loud bang followed by a bright purple light filled the hallway outside of the room in which she was being held. Smiling slowly, Sakura’s fingers wrapped around the bars. “I warned you not to make him angry.” 

He was a blur of silver and purple, his deep coal eyes filled with white-hot rage. Pooling her energy, Sakura slowly pulled herself to her feet. The man tried to fight back, but the shock of purple lightning tore through his body, coating Kakashi’s arm and hair in bright red blood. It took a moment - a long, silent moment - for  _ dark _ Kakashi to recede. Looking through the mess of their target, he quickly located the cell keys and moved to Sakura.

“You’re early.” She smiled weakly as he checked her for wounds, his hands blindly worked on the lock. 

“You were gone a while. I missed you.” His tone was light, but the worried undertones made Sakura’s heart clench. They had been apart five hours, and he had missed her. She couldn’t remember Sasuke  _ ever _ saying that he missed her. Once her cell was open, he quickly freed her wrists. “Are you okay?” He finally asked, his hands moving over her arms.

“Kakashi.” She grabbed his hands before they could make another pass. “I’m fine. I managed to burn off most of the drug with my chakra. I’m just a little weak.” 

Sighing, he cupped her face. “No more solo missions.” 

Smiling lightly, Sakura reached up to tug down his mask. As he leaned in to press a searing kiss to her lips, Sakura knew that she would never love anyone the way she loved Kakashi Hatake. 

The journey home, although not long, felt… heavy. They had missed Naruto’s swearing in ceremony, but only by a few days. It wasn’t his disappointment that worried her though. It was the fact that Sasuke was waiting at home. Waiting at home for his wife. His wife that had cheated on him with their ex-sensei. His wife that wasn’t quite sure what she wanted anymore. 

She watched Kakashi’s back as he maintained their small campfire, his hair lit a vibrant orange from the flames. They would be back to the village in the morning - back to their normal lives. Honestly, she was quite sure what normal was anymore. Sakura’s life had changed so much over the last year, it was hard to know where the ground was. Crossing her arms over her stomach, she gave Kakashi a small smile when he stood and turned. She didn’t want to be this woman - the one obsessed with a guy and ‘what it all meant’. After all, it couldn’t really  _ mean _ anything, could it? There were laws, and Sasuke, and… She didn’t know how Kakashi really felt. He never seemed like the type to settle down, or even date seriously. Even if he was, would he want to do so with a woman fourteen years his junior?

“You look like you want to talk.” It was almost a question. 

Biting her lip, Sakura lightly shook her head. “The opposite, actually.” She breathed, moving towards the single tent. If she was going to have to say goodbye, she would do so properly. 

He moved quickly, yet his actions seemed lazy - always lazy. Even those skilled, skilled hands that could move faster than the human eye could follow. They made careful work of tangling in her bubblegum locks as he kissed her deeply. Sakura was sure that she had never been kissed quite like this. He was her opposite, her equal. Kakashi didn’t force Sakura to embrace the darkness, he helped her balance it out… her other half. 

“I love you.” The words tumbled in a shuttered whisper from trembling lips. 

Although his hands remained, and his eyes softened, Kakashi didn’t speak. There was a juvenile part of her that wanted him to say it back - even if it wasn’t true. She hadn’t made it all up in her head, not this time. As if he had read her mind, Kakashi finally spoke. “If I say it, I won’t be able to take it back. It’ll be real.” His eyes pleaded with her to understand.

How could she ask that of him? With everything growing messier by the day, how could she ask him to give her something that wouldn’t be hers to keep? Instead of pushing the matter, Sakura kissed him again, feeling his affection for her in the way he pressed their bodies together. She found purchase in those small gestures; comfort in the words he  _ didn’t _ say. Kakashi loved her, and she loved him. Maybe in another life or time, that could have been enough. But she was hiding secrets, and causing him to break the law. This wasn’t some fairy tale dreamed up in the optimistic imagination of a twelve year old girl. This was reality - the sticky web of lies she had woven for herself. 

And yet, she still preferred it. 

This night - this one night - was not like the others. It was slow, and careful, and… sad. It was goodbye. 

She knew he would be there, and yet shock still wracked her features at the sight of Sasuke sitting at the kitchen table with Naruto. Maybe it was childish to be thankful that her best friend was there as a buffer, but her head was still swimming. She had Kakashi had split ways at the gate, his eyes dark and heavy over his mask. Not trusting her voice, Sakura hadn’t even said goodbye. It wasn’t like she wouldn’t see him again, though… things were bound to change. 

“Sakura!” Naruto cheered, jumping from his chair. Sasuke simply nodded in greeting, his fingers toying with the edge of his teacup. “You missed my ceremony! I got your mission report yesterday! I can’t believe  _ you _ got drugged.” He laughed. 

Truth be told, the whole thing  _ was _ ironic, in retrospect. Although, it seemed Sasuke didn’t think so. “I suppose you’ve gotten all this ANBU mess out of your system?” His flat voice immediately sucked the air out of the room.

“Uh- I should… I should probably go…” Naruto smiled uncomfortably and scratched the back of his head. 

“Don’t.” Sasuke stopped him. “You seem to know what’s been going on. Stay.”

“Sasuke…” Sakura breathed his name, exhausted and losing a battle with a migraine. “I think we should talk.” When no one said anything, she continued. “About what we want.”

“I know what I want, Sakura. I’ve made that very clear. I thought that this is what you wanted - me. Home.”

Naruto seemed to find her ceiling particularly interesting as the conversation progressed. She didn’t necessarily want him here for the heavy stuff, but if Sasuke wanted to talk now, she would oblige. “I want a divorce.”

The shock shared between the three was palpable. Sakura hadn't been planning on saying that - she hadn’t even really thought it, but now that it was out there… Yeah. She wanted a divorce. She didn’t love Sasuke anymore, maybe she never really had. There might not have been much of a future for her and Kakashi, but she had to do this now, while she still could. 

“Is it someone else?” Sasuke asked while Naruto gaped like a fish. 

“In a sense.” She replied honestly. Seeing the anger pulling at his features, Sakura sighed. “Would you even notice? If I divorced you today, would your life change all that much? You’re never home, Sasuke, and even when you are, you’re distant. This isn’t about you, or someone else… it’s about me. I just… don’t want this anymore.” 

Jaw tightening, he stood, eyes hard. “Fine.” The word was spat. It was almost comical how this was the most emotion he had ever shown for their marriage. “If being alone is what you want, then I’m happy to give it to you!”

Naruto managed to pull Sakura out of Sasuke’s way as he stormed out, nearly a blur. As he righted her, she blinked slowly. She had done it… she left Sasuke. “Sakura…” Naruto’s voice was cautious, his eyes gentle. “Is this… Is this because you love Kakashi-Sensei?”

Staring blankly at the door Sasuke had left ajar, Sakura shook her head as her eyes began to water. “It has less to do with the fact that I’m in love with Kakashi, and more to do with the fact that I’m pregnant.” 

“What did you just say!?”   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know things kinda take a weird pace during this chapter. Tbh, I feel the beginnings of writer’s block coming on, but I  _ really _ wanted to get this one down!
> 
> I actually decided on the pregnancy twist halfway through this chapter, so I hope I got some of you! I know my readers are usually little sleuths when it comes to subtext.
> 
> In case anyone was wondering, she figured it out when Kunuma was listing symptoms she had been having!


	10. Ten

**Ten**

Did she just - no. There was no way Sakura was… And with  _ Kakashi-Sensei!? _ Naruto tried to process his thoughts as Sakura’s watery green eyes moved to him. “I’m pregnant.” She breathed, biting her bottom lip. This was… news. Big news. 

“And… Kakashi-Sensei…”

“Yeah.” She closed her eyes, maybe in pain, maybe in shame. Either way, Naruto was reeling. He had been Hokage  _ one week _ , and already he would have to work on a major cover up. No wonder Granny-Tsunade was so desperate for him to take her place. 

Contrary to popular belief, Naruto wasn’t an idiot. Okay, not a  _ complete _ idiot. As it turned out, he had a real knack for this Hokage stuff. He had memorized hundreds of laws down to the letter, which was how he knew that there might be a way for Sakura and Kakashi to be together… maybe. He didn’t want to get their hopes up, and he was hoping to be able to overturn the law all together - at least in the case of an adult student. 

“He has no idea.” Sakura sobbed, and Naruto realized he had just been standing there like a mute moron. “I couldn’t tell him, Naruto. If anyone found out-”

“It’ll be okay, Sakura.” He cooed, hoping that he sounded more convincing than he felt. Pulling the kunoichi in for a hug, he rested his chin on her head. “We can tell everyone it’s mine!” He joked, earning a short, watery laugh from his best friend. 

“What if the baby has his hair? Everyone will know… Kakashi will be ruined.”

It might have been naive to expect Kakashi to be the responsible party here. He  _ was _ older, and their old sensei. Whatever attracted Sakura to Kakashi must have been something… unseen. Maybe he was secretly a hopeless romantic that read her poetry? The thought was comical, though not completely unbelievable. Regardless of blame, it was clear that Sakura loved him - and not only because she admitted as much. If they loved each other, Naruto would do anything in his power to make things right. 

“I’m going to go to the office. There has to be something I can do.”

She shook her head, long pink locks whipping at his chest. “You can’t overturn centuries worth of law in a few months, Naruto.”

Unable to help himself, Naruto gave her a wide, toothy grin. “You better believe I can! Because I’m Hokage!”

He couldn’t do it. With a groan, Naruto’s head slapped against the papers on his desk. It wasn’t that he couldn’t get the law amended or revised, it was that he would need the permission of the council to do so. Those old windbags were probably around when the law was originally written. As a new Hokage, it wouldn’t be the best idea for his first act to be making it legal for teachers to sleep with their students. 

Rubbing his temples, Naruto looked out over the village. It had only been a few days since he had left a sobbing Sakura alone in her house, and he already felt like time was running out. He had hardly been home since then, and Hinata was beginning to worry. It wasn’t like Naruto could just explain everything either. For better or worse, they were here now, and if Sakura needed this from him, he would give it to her. She had always done so much for him. She had literally held his heart in her hand to keep him alive. He wouldn’t let a stupid, outdated law get in the way of her happiness. 

Naruto blinked from his thoughts as a puff of smoke signaled the arrival of part of his headache. “Hey, Kakashi-Sensei.” He smiled. “What brings you here?”

“I heard.” Those two simple words were as good as pouring ice down Naruto’s spine. “Why didn’t you tell me?” His hard, dark eyes made the younger man gulp.

“You heard? How did you hear?” Had Sakura finally told him?

“It’s all over the village!”

“It is!?” Naruto sat up straighter.  _ He _ certainly hadn’t told anyone. “How did everyone find out?”

“It’s obvious, don’t you think?”

“How far along is she!?” Naruto cried.

“What?”

“What?”

There was a long pause where the men seemed to size each other up. “What are you talking about, Naruto?”

“What are  _ you _ talking about?” His heart was pounding in his chest. Had he just given up the biggest secret he’d probably ever be entrusted with? In only three days!?

“I asked you first…”

“I’m the Hokage.” 

Another tense silence followed. “I was talking about Sakura divorcing Sasuke...” Kakashi had switched to his ‘sensei’ voice, his all-seeing eyes narrowing further. “Naruto… What do you know that I don’t?”

Sakura stared listlessly at her toilet, wondering if she had to throw up yet again. She quickly learned that using her chakra to starve off the morning sickness just left her weak and useless. Probably because the baby was already feeding on her reserves. She was  _ almost _ tempted to break her seal just to get some relief. 

Deciding that lunch was probably safely in her stomach for the time being, Sakura brushed her teeth for the third time that morning. She remembered Ino talking about some of the worst parts of pregnancy like they were a minor inconvenience. This… this was torture. If should could find a way to harness these symptoms, Torture and Interrogation would be revolutionized. Falling to the couch in the loose sweats she had slept in, the kunoichi closed her eyes. It would get better. It would have to.

Just as she was starting to relax, a knock sounded at her door. No. Absolutely not. “Unless someone is dying, either go away or let yourself in.” She called, eyes still closed. 

The door opening signaled that it was someone close to her. As she tried to guess at who it might be, a familiar chakra signature caused her to bolt upright. Even as her stomach churned, Sakura looked questioningly to Kakashi. 

He didn’t speak, just simply looked between her face and stomach. “Fucking Naruto.” Sakura sighed, leaning back into the cushions. 

“So it’s true?” Kakashi asked, sinking into the couch next to her. He even pulled down his mask so she could see his frown. When she nodded, it deepened. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

There was a book of reasons as to why she didn’t tell him. The biggest being… fear. She was a coward when it came to relationships, that much was obvious. If she didn’t tell Kakashi, she could always imagine that he would have reacted well. That he was excited about the prospect of them having a baby together. But if he found out - which he clearly did - she would have to face the reality of his feelings about… everything. 

Deciding that it was all too much to voice, Sakura sighed. “I didn’t want to complicate things.”

“I think we’re well past complicated.” Sakura bit her lip as he reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “Sakura… I want to be here for you. For our child.” He breathed the word like it was weighted. 

“How will you do that from Jail?” She asked, shaking her head. “Unless you’ve got some answer-”

“Marry me.” Sakura breath caught as he took her hand. “Naruto said that the council wouldn’t separate us if we’re married. I’d be punished - apparently unable to teach again.” The smallest of smiles flickered across his face. “A great loss.” 

Sakura’s chest tightened. “You want to marry me so that you don’t get arrested?”

“I want to marry you because I love you.” All the air seemed to leave her lungs as he pressed his forehead against hers. 

“This is a stupid plan.” Sakura argued weakly. “People will talk, and I hate that you smoke, and I’m still technically married to Sasuke. It’s too big of a risk. What if it doesn’t go the way Naruto thinks it will?”

He cupped her neck, flashing his cherry blossom tattoo. “I’ll quit smoking.” He promised. “Sakura… do you love me?”

“Yes.” Her voice cracked.

“Do you trust me to always do what I can to protect you and our family?”

“Yes.” Sakura couldn’t help matching his small smile. 

“So tell me… would the risk be worth the reward?” The soft, loving joy in his eyes made Sakura’s worry seem foolish. There was never a risk with Kakashi - even when standing in the middle of a dark hurricane. 

“Absolutely.” 

  
  


**Epilogue**

_ Ten Years Later _

  
  


Making sure her porcelain bunny mask was tucked safely away in her pack, Sakura smiled as she opened the door. “I’m home!” She called, following the noise of giggling into the living room. 

The sight of Kakashi sitting cross-legged on the floor, their ten year old son, and six year old daughter placing bows in his unruly hair, was just the welcome home that she needed. Although Kakashi had retired to take care of the kids full time, Sakura had been considering leaving ANBU to pitch in. She hated missing little moments like this. It wasn’t that Shikamaru was a bad partner… she just missed her old one. 

“You look pretty.” Sakura hummed as she bent at the waist to kiss him hello. 

“You too.” Kakashi’s eyes curled with his grin. “How was your mission?”

“It was a scroll delivery, dad!” Their eldest, Arami, rolled his bright green eyes. “It was probably boring!”

Sakura smiled as Kakashi gave her a knowing look. When the kids were older, they would tell them all about ANBU. “Yup! Totally boring.” Situating herself on the floor next to her husband, Sakura pulled Yana onto her lap. “It’s way past your bedtime!” She accused her giggling daughter. 

“I was scared.” Yana declared as Sakura swept her long pink hair from her face. 

“Scared?” Frowning, Sakura ducked to catch her expression. “Scared of what?”

“The dark.” 

With a knowing hum, Kakashi pressed a kiss to Sakura’s temple. “Don’t worry. You’ll learn to love it.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was unreasonably excited to write in Naruto’s POV. This is probably my fav Naruto from any/all of my stories. I actually have another story planned (eventually) in which Naruto is on Sakura’s ANBU team, and they’re on Hokage detail. Aka, keeping Kakashi from blowing off meetings to read.
> 
> This was kind of an excuse to get some levity to it. I love the little back and forth between Naruto and Kakashi. 
> 
> I know this chapter is a little short, but it felt like the perfect place to end things (given my oncoming writer's block). I had planned on it being longer, honestly. I figured a short finished fic trumped a permanent hiatus. I really hope you guys loved this one! I was kind of worried with the whole infidelity thing (it doesn’t seem to be very popular), but I felt like this story needed it!
> 
> As I said above, I do have plans for a new fic, I'm just not sure how long it'll take to get going. You can follow the status of it on my AO3 profile and Tumblr!


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